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It was a normal Friday evening, and it was also Chuuya's favourite time of the week. Work was over, there were no more annoying coworkers, and he finally had some alone time with his favourite bottle of wine. Relieved of the stresses of the past week, Chuuya sat on his favourite armchair in front of his TV, which was currently playing some random soap opera (he put it on as background noise). He leaned back in his chair, took a deep breath, and thought about the events of the past week: Higuchi was chasing Akutagawa around as per usual, Tachihara brought a new pack of pencils and decided to go around flexing them to everyone, and Kouyou was mostly in her office crying about Kyouka. So there wasn't anything new.Chuuya sighed and took a sip of his wine. Although the cosy scene seemed normal at first glance, Chuuya had an unsettling feeling, as if something was about to happen. As if there was someone lurking in the shadows of his home. But then again, he'd always been an over-thinker, so maybe it was just his mind playing tricks.That was until he heard giggling coming from his bedroom door across the hallway. Familiar giggling that belonged to a certain bandage-wearing freak.Annoyed, Chuuya put down his glass of wine and dragged himself out of his comfortable seat to see if his intuition was correct. And what a surprise, as he opened his bedroom door, he was greeted by his long term friend Dazai."What the hell," Chuuya said while he rubbed his forehead with his thumb and pointer finger. He already knew his evening was ruined, might as well see what the reason was (but when was there ever a reason when Dazai was involved?)Dazai turned, a shit eating grin plastered onto his face. "...CHIIIIIBBBIIIIII WHAT A SURPRISE!!""Fuck you mean 'what a surprise', this is MY HOUSE.""Erm actually this is a flat; plural noun: flats. A set of rooms forming an individual residence, typically on one floor and within a larger building containing a number of such residences, for your information.""oh FUCK OFF-" Chuuya's exclamation of annoyance was paused when he noticed Dazai's hands suspiciously hidden behind his back. "What's that?" he nodded vaguely in Dazai's direction."What's what?" "You know what.""Know what's what's what?""Don't act stupid with me you little prick.""Now now chibi, it's kinda hypocritical that you're calling me 'little' considering your own... situation. But don't worry, I still love you <3""JUST TELL ME WHAT THE THING BEHIND YOUR BACK IS DAMMIT!!" Chuuya walked behind Dazai to see him carrying his computer. "Are you trying to steal my computer?"Dazai put a hand on his chest and gasped in mock offence, almost dropping the damn computer because he's a dumbass. "Chibi... how DARE you suggest I would partake in such atrocities!! But yes I am.""You little shit- WHY are you trying to steal my computer?""...Do you want the actual story or a story filled with bullshit to make you feel bad for me?" Chuuya snatched the computer away from Dazai's hands, and stomped on his foot. "OK OK FINE!! My computer broke and I was in desperate need of one.""Ok, first of all how did your own computer break so terribly that you need to steal my one? Second, what's so important that you need a computer at all???" "Well let's see... number one the computer broke because I took a bath with it-"Chuuya interrupted him, "Why the hell would you take a bath with your computer?" "You know how people take baths with their toasters?""...nevermind.""Aaaaand number two, I really need to play Roblox!!""Mother fucker WHY do you need to play a game about digital lego bricks so badly?!""Chuuya. Darling. Sweet pea-""Shut up. Answer the question"Dazai sighs and puts a hand on Chuuya's shoulder. "Now I know this might sound silly to you since you're uncultured... But I really really super duper need Roblox so I can play dress to impress with my baddies and scream 'SLAYYYYY' to random kids on the internet!!!""If not understanding a word you just said is 'being uncultured' then I don't wanna know what you call actual uncultured people." Dazai rolls his eyes at Chuuya's obvious lack of understanding for the new generation until his eyes light up with another one of his silly ideas."Heyyyy heres an idea...-""No.""You haven't even heard what I was gonna-""No.""JUST LISTEN TO ME-""No.""YOU'RE SO MEAN!!""No.""𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓷 𝓸𝓻 𝓘'𝓵𝓵 𝓼𝓽𝓻𝓸𝓴𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝔀𝓻𝓲𝓼𝓽𝓼 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓬𝓸𝓷𝓼𝓮𝓷𝓽""HOW THE HELL ARE YOU SPEAKING IN CURSIVE?!""𝓲𝓽𝓼 𝓬𝓪𝓵𝓵𝓮𝓭 𝓫𝓮𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓼𝓲𝓵𝓵𝔂, 𝓰𝓮𝓽 𝓲𝓽 𝓻𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽, 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓫𝓸𝔂 𝓴𝓲𝓼𝓼𝓮𝓻""OK OK FINE!! Just tell me your dumbass idea!""YIPPEE!! les play boblax together >:3""...if I say no you won't give me a choice, will you?""nuh uh >:3"Already regretting his decision, Chuuya takes his phone out of his trouser pocket, opens Roblox and sits on the edge of his bed. "You better rate me five stars, jackass."Overjoyed with Chuuya's cooperation, Dazai skipped towards the bed and sat down a little too close that would be considered comfortable. Chuuya completely disregards this, however, and gave his computer back to Dazai so he could log onto Roblox, and the two friends joined a Dress To Impress game. As expected, they're welcomed to the sight of children up way past their bedtime playing the dress-up game. They wait a while, not sure what to do as the previous round is ending, but soon enough a new round begins with a new theme. "Oh scenecore!! I love scene!!" Dazai enthusiastically says, clapping his hands together."Well you better do it right then or I'll beat you up-" Chuuya sips on another glass of wine."Heyyyy where'd you get that?"He takes a longer than necessary sip, "Don't question it."They start playing and already, not even two seconds in, Chuuya starts raging."GOD DAMMIT!! WHERE IS THE HAIR?!!! WHY AM I BALD??!!"Dazai took Chuuya's phone off him and directed him towards the hair area thingy. "You're hopeless."Instead of saying 'thank you', Chuuya just replied with a "AND YOU'RE A FREAK!!" and carried on with his game.After five minutes, the game was over and it was time for voting. Both Chuuya and Dazai had simultaneously agreed that they would vote the other 5 stars (to both piss off the kids playing and because they're both petty). Dazai was the first person on the runway and of course he spammed pose 28 like the whore he is. Chuuya still voted him 5 stars however, because, as much as Chuuya didn't want to admit it, Dazai's outfit was in fact a good outfit which fit the theme nicely. And since Chuuya was a man of his word, he would restrain himself from beating Dazai up (for now).However, someone else in the server had a different opinion.ruby_dti123: this outfit is terrible "WELL FUCK YOU RUBY!!" Chuuya couldn't help but scream at his screen, "ONLY I'M ALLOWED TO TALK SHIT ABOUT ASSFACE DAZAI!!""If I hadn't known better I would think you're insulting me, but really I know this is a declaration of love <3" was Dazai's snarky reply. "FUCK YOU TOO DAZAI BOTH YOU AND RUBY CAN DIE""Chuuya, honey, it's just a game.""Yeah you're right... lets just see what this Ruby kid's outfit is so we can bully the shit outta her"And sure enough after a few other npc kids had shown off their scenecore outfits, it was Ruby's turn.chuuya: THIS OUTFIT IS ########
chuuya: ######
chuuya: HJJKJAHJS###### "WHY THE HELL DOES IT KEEP COMING UP WITH TAGS YOU DUMBASS PIECE OF SHIT-"ruby_dti123: sorry i dont speak tagschuuya: ###
chuuya: KAY
chuuya: WHY
chuuya: ESSDazai had to practically hold Chuuya back. The redhead looked like he was about to go insane, and surprisingly Dazai was the normal one for once. "THIS DUMBASS CHILD!!" Chuuya screamed along with a bunch of random growling noises that not even the most multilingual person could understand. "SHE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT SCENECORE IS I HOPE HER MOTHER FORGETS TO PICK HER UP FROM SCHOOL!!"For once, Dazai could agree with Chuuya's anger. "I know right?? The theme was 'Scene' which consists of bright neon colours and cool patterns, but this child just wore all black-""KILL YOURSELF RUBY!!" "-Honestly I think this is quite offensive to Scene people and subcultures alike, does she even know her stuff?? My god, like I know she's a child but in this day and age I'm pretty sure this is common knowledge!""I HOPE YOU STEP ON A LEGO!""-Like I would understand if this was someone from an older generation because since they were raised in a more judgmental manner where alternative fashion choices weren't as popular so maybe they just don't understand. But a child, a younger generation who's surrounded by different people everyday, playing a fashion game made for those who are knowledgeable in such things? And she doesn't?? That's quite hypocritical of you on your part Ruby, get with the times...""...yeah dude we get it. You can stop with your 'Erm actually'."After a long awkward silence, they both voted Ruby one star and carried on playing. The next person on the runway was Chuuya, and of course he created the most beautiful, amazing, outstanding, gorgeous outfit that fit the theme with the upmost accuracy. But again Ruby decided to be a little shit.ruby_dti123: this outfit is even worse
chuuya: I WILL ########
chuuya: #####
chuuya: I #### YOU
chuuya: H
chuuya: A
chuuya: T
chuuya: E
chuuya: YO#
chuuya: YOUUUU"I honestly think this game hates ginger people," Dazai notices Chuuya's struggle to put his hatred across to the child on the other side of his screen. He votes Chuuya five stars (because he has to and also because he feels bad for the guy) and voting was over. Which meant it was time to reveal the winners. "AW FUCK THIS!!" Chuuya threw his phone into the wall, pissed when he found out he was last. Pleased with his second place, Dazai took multiple screenshots and spammed the chat with multiple 'SLAYYYYY's. Chuuya then grabbed the computer off Dazai and threw that at the wall too.If the wall hadn't experienced enough damage as it is, Chuuya then used his ability to throw the bed at the wall too, absolutely destroying it and leaving debris across the entire fucking place.As Chuuya was at the height of his rage and Dazai was enjoying the whole thing, they heard a knock at the door. Reluctantly stepping away from his mess, Chuuya walked up to answer it."I SWEAR IF ITS SOME RANDOM ASS- oh it's just you."At the door was the monotone, monochrome orphan with a lack of eyebrows known as Akutagawa."Pardon the intrusion- WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO YOUR HOUSE?!" the victorian shit began with his thick British accent (I lied, he isn't monotone at all). "Nah don't sweat it," Chuuya said as if that made the situation any better."Uh... I-I was just wondering if you required any help.""Help? Why would I need help?? I'm fucking jolly," his face (which was redder than his hair) gave it away that he was, in fact, not jolly. And the no-Dazai-approval-dude knew this."Are you certain? Your house looks...-""My house looks what? Why would you think I need help anyway?" "...You live in a Port Mafia-issued flat with multiple other mafioso, including me, many of them stating that they heard commotion coming from this very room, again including me.""Psst chibi!!" Dazai whispers while hiding behind the front door, "Who is it?" "It's Akutagawa," Chuuya replies in a normal, inside voice."OH SHIT!!" Dazai jumps out from behind the door.Akutagawa's face immediately lights up when he sees Dazai, "Oh Dazai, hello-" The poor guy gets interrupted yet again."Fuck off orphan boy," Dazai flips him off and runs towards Chuuya's conveniently open window, and puts one leg out."I-is he about to jump?!" "Maybe... DO A FLIP!!" And do a flip he did. Leaving a flabbergasted Akutagawa and a nonchalant (dread head, sorry I had to make a reference like the gen z fuck I am) Chuuya behind. "...So wanna get something to eat?""..."