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Twenty years after the end of Silver Flames“I, Helion Spell-Cleaver, High Lord of the Day Court, hereby name my son, Lucien Spell-Cleaver, Prince of Day.” A warm, gold circlet was placed on his head. “And heir to the throne.”Roaring applause almost drowned out the sound of Lucien’s heartbeat in his ears. As he gazed out into the sea of people, his eyes lingered on the smiling faces of friends from various courts gathered for his moment. Nuan, the master tinkerer from Dawn. Cresseida, princess of Adriata from Summer. Kallias and Vivianne, High Lord and Lady of Winter. His heart caught in his throat when his gaze fell upon the delegates from the Spring, Autumn, and Night courts. As his eyes met those of the High Lady of the Night Court’s, her face was unreadable.~~~~~~~The morning after winter solstice, 20 years ago~~~~~~~Lucien hastily scrawled on a piece of paper as the first rays of the morning sun painted streaks of light across the desk where he sat. Sighing, he signed his name at the bottom of the page and folded it in half before giving himself the option to read through it again. He knew what he had to say and it didn’t need to be perfect. Without a second thought, he rose from his position at the desk, grabbed his cloak, and snuck into the hall. He had heard the High Lord milling about as he had laid in bed that morning wishing sleep would claim him. That sound was what sprung him into action. He knew that if he didn’t do this now, he never would.Quietly, Lucien made his way down the hall to Rhysand’s study. The door was slightly ajar. Lucien knocked softly to avoid waking the whole house after such an eventful night.“Come,” Rhysand said. “Ah, little fox, you’re up early.”“Actually more like up late,” Lucien said as he strode into the office.The High Lord lounged at his desk in a simple black shirt and pants with sleep-mused hair. No matter how many times Lucien saw him like this, it still took him by surprise. Gone was the dark aura that he had been so accustomed to associating with Rhys. If Lucien didn’t know better, he might’ve thought the man before him was no more powerful than himself.“Ah,” Rhys said clearing his throat. He eyed the piece of paper in Lucien’s hand. “I have a feeling I know what this is about.”“Then you know why I’m resigning my post as emissary to the Night Court effective immediately.” He handed Rhys the folded paper which Rhys gingerly accepted with a frown.“Why don’t you sit down and we can discuss this. There’s no need to make hasty decisions,” Rhys said and gestured to the armchair tucked into the corner of his study near the door.Lucien shook his head. “This has been a long time coming and is by no means hasty. It was just a decision that was sped along after overhearing your conversation with the shadowsinger last night”.Rhysand’s frown deepened. “I’m sorry you had to hear that.”Lucien shrugged. “It’s for the best, truly.”Rhys opened the letter to glance at it briefly. “And what if I don’t accept your resignation?”“I didn’t realize I needed your permission to leave,” Lucien said as tied his cloak around his shoulders. This conversation was getting old quickly.“No, I suppose you don’t. But what of Feyre? Don’t you owe it to her to tell her where you’re running off to?” He paused. “And what you’re running away from?”Lucien huffed out a breath. “I’ll send her a letter once I’m settled in Dawn. As for your second question, I’m fairly certain anyone in their right mind could guess why I’m leaving.”He had only made up his mind that morning to seek refuge in Dawn. Briefly, he had considered returning to the human lands, back to the manor with Vassa and Jurian. But his pride got in the way. He loved them dearly but couldn’t stomach the idea of living with a happy couple while stewing in his own misery.He had also considered returning to Spring, a place where no Archeron sister would dare come to find him. But his relationship with Tamlin wasn’t there yet. And may be it never would be again.And of course, Summer was out of the question. Though he had many friends there, he wasn’t so sure the rest of the population would take kindly to a former Night Court emissary taking up residence in their court even after the blood rubies had been rescinded.So Dawn it was. He’d find Nuan and have her chat with Thesan. Maybe he could find a new role in that court.Pulling him from his thoughts, Rhys questioned, “What of Elain then? Will you tell her?”This time Lucien actually chuckled. “I doubt she’ll even notice I’ve gone. And if she happens to, I doubt she’ll care enough to ask why.”“You would give up on your mate because of one thing that happened one night?” Rhys said as he rose from his desk. He rounded to the front and leaned back on it. “Azriel will stand down as I’m sure you heard last night.”“It’s not just one night, Rhys. You’ve seen how they look at each other. I’ve been turning a blind eye and waiting and giving her space and trying for years,” Lucien said, becoming exasperated with the conversation. “She clearly isn’t interested and I won’t keep tormenting myself by thinking she could be.”Lucien turned for the door. “As for the shadowsinger, tell him he can have her if he feels so strongly that he deserves her.” He shrugged turning to face Rhys once more. “I give up.”Rhys sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. “Make sure you send that letter to Feyre.”Lucien gave a curt nod and turned to leave. Just as he was about to close the door to the High Lord’s study, he poked his head back in.“For the record, you should know I would never invoke the Blood Duel. I’m no animal.”“No, you are not, little fox,” Rhys said as he returned to his seat at this desk. “You certainly are not.”As he turned again from the High Lord’s study, he could hear light rustling in the bedroom across the hall. The smell of jasmine and honey gently caressed his senses and for a moment, his heart stuttered. Not long enough for him to change his mind. Without another thought, he turned, ran down the stairs, and out the door of the River House into the brisk morning air. He turned back to look at the house for just a moment and thought he noticed a curtain rustle as though someone had hurriedly closed it after peering outside. He shook his head once more and winnowed to his apartment. It was time to pack the few things he had and leave.
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The morning after winter solstice (Elain)She hadn’t slept much that night. Maybe sleep claimed her for a few minutes here and there, but more often than not she was awake. Tossing and turning, her mind replayed the events of the night to her over and over. Guilt, shame, and embarrassment each burned their own hole in her stomach.How could she have been so stupid, she thought. Why would someone like Azriel ever want someone like her? She was just the middle sister. Quiet and forgotten as always.But it had seemed like he wanted her. He had leaned in, his eyes falling to her lips. The telltale sign of a kiss. But it never came. A mistake he said.Elain knew she needed to talk with him, understand what happened. But the guilt, shame, and embarrassment kept her pinned to her bed. She couldn’t go talk to him after returning the necklace. It would be too awkward. So instead, she laid in bed wishing the world would open up and swallow her whole.Just as she finally felt her eyelids getting heavy and sleep a blink away, she was roused by the sounds of hushed voices. Given her room was by Rhys’ study, this wasn’t an uncommon occurrence. He was constantly talking. The thing that struck her as uncommon was who he was talking to at such an early hour. She knew who it was without making out his voice. His heartbeat spoke for him.Elain sighed. Could he never give her any peace? No matter where he was, she could hear his heart. Sure, when he was in the human lands it was much quieter, almost unnoticeable. But even then, it was always there. And when he was in Velaris, then it was unbearable. It was especially unbearable when they were in the same room. Not because it was thunderously loud, although it was that. It was unbearable because she could hear it quicken or skip a beat when she felt his gaze fall on her.She sat up in bed as she heard Lucien’s voice migrate from Rhys’ office to the hall.“For the record, you should know I would never invoke the Blood Duel. I’m no animal.”She found herself slowly approaching her bedroom door at those words. Blood Duel? Why on earth would they be talking about something that sounded so harrowing the morning after Solstice?Before she had a moment to even contemplate opening the door, she heard hurried footsteps race down the stairs and out of the house. She quickly crossed the room to her window and peaked outside from behind the curtain.Lucien stood outside, back to the River House. His hair was in a long braid down his back which was clad in a heavy cloak. He looked ready for a journey. Suddenly, he turned to look back at the house. Feeling a new wave of embarrassment rising, she hastily closed the curtains and headed toward her bedroom door.As she cracked open her door, she could see the shadow of the High Lord lounging at his desk in the study across the hall. She paused. What would he think of her barging into his study asking after her mate? She certainly didn’t want to give him the wrong impression.Still, she found her feet moving her across the hall to the threshold of his study. She lightly knocked once on the slightly ajar door.“Come in,” Rhys said.Elain pushed the door open further. The High Lord sat at his desk, head in his hands.“Good morning,” Elain said politely, walking to stand in front of his desk.Rhys looked up, surprised. He gave her a small smile. “Good morning to you, Elain.”They existed for a moment in awkward silence as Elain twisted the belt over her rob nervously between two fingers, not quite meeting his gaze.“Can I help you with something?” Rhys asked gently.“Where is Lucien going?” She blurted the question without thinking, finally raising her gaze to look him in the eyes.Rhys gave her a curious look. “Well, as it so happens, he’s headed to the Dawn Court. As of about ten or so minutes ago he resigned his post as our emissary and let me know he’d be leaving the Night Court. Permanently.”A wave of sadness washed over her. Why should she be sad? Wasn’t this exactly what she wanted?“Oh,” she said simply. Every question she had for Rhys stopped short of being asked except for one.“What’s a Blood Duel?”Rhys grimaced and looked to be weighing his options before responding, “nothing you need to worry about.”His answer felt like a blow to the gut. Realistically, Elain knew he meant to make her feel better with his words. He, like the others, wanted to shield her from the horrors of the world. But when it came down to it, she didn’t want to be shielded and every time they tried to hide her from the world, it just made her angrier.Of course, no one would ever know the amount of anger she kept bottled up. Elain was an expert when it came to hiding her feelings behind a pretty smile. No one was ever the wiser to her feelings either because they didn’t notice or they simply didn’t care to look hard enough.So, instead of berating Rhys for his response, she simply smiled and said, “I see.”As she turned to leave to head back to her room, Rhys interrupted her thoughts and said, “Elain, please don’t tell Feyre about Lucien. I want it to come from me.”She barely turned her head over her shoulder to give him a quick nod before rushing back into her room and closing the door behind her. Elain let herself slide down the door into a puddle on the floor and weep. She wept for her encounter with Azriel. But more than that, she wept over her unhappiness at the role she had been pushed into her entire life. The gentle middle daughter who was only good enough to garden and bake. The daughter who was overlooked because she was not a warrior and never would be.She laid there on the floor for what felt like hours as she watched the ray of sun infiltrating her room from behind the curtains make it’s way across the floor, signaling the passing hours of another day. It wasn’t until a knock at her door came that she straightened. She wasn’t ready to talk to her sisters, admit to them what had happened between her and Azriel.But it was not either of her sister’s voices that begged entry. Instead, a tiny black shadowed slithered its way out from under the door and peaked up at her. Though the shadows didn’t have faces, she could tell it didn’t want to be near her, let alone in her room. It shied away from her after circling once before retreating back from where it came.She held her breath waiting for what she knew would come next. A third knock.“Elain,” Azriel said. “Can we talk?”
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5 years later (Lucien)Blinking heavily, Lucien’s eyes slowly came into focus. The intricately painted ceiling of golden symbols spun nauseatingly as Lucien slammed his eyes shut again and groaned.“I was wondering when you would wake up,” a soft feminine voice said from across the room.“Mmph,” Lucien sighed. “What time is it?”“Half past noon,” the voice responded.“Shit,” Lucien said and bolted upright. He clamped his mouth shut as another nauseating wave rocketed through him.“Here, drink this,” the voice said, now next to him holding a cup to his lips.Lucien kept his eyes clamped shut and shook his head.“Come now,” she said. “We’ve been through this before. If you don’t drink it now, you’ll be vomiting all day and no good to anyone.”Lucien moaned angrily before parting his lips just enough for the liquid to swirl into his mouth. The taste of ginger and peppermint clung to the inside of his mouth before he forced himself to swallow. Immediately, the nausea subsided and he was able to crack his eyes open to gaze upon his savior.“Thank you, Nuan,” he murmured and ran his hands over his face.“I’d say anytime, but I’m finding that I’m growing quite tired of this little game. You staying out until gods know when with gods know who and then coming home blasted drunk, making all sorts of racket. Then, when you finally do pass out, you sleep until an unholy hour and miss every meeting on your calendar. I vouched for you for your job if you remember. Is this childish behavior going to stop anytime soon? Or should I expect another five years of babysitting my almost four hundred year old roommate?”Lucien finally let his eyes drift to the female in front of him. Her long, dark hair fell gently across her shoulders. His gaze fell to her golden arm making the oh so familiar clicking and whirring sounds his own eye made. And then slowly, he brought his eyes up to meet her steely stare. She was sick of his shit. And for good reason. When he had arrived in the Dawn Court five years ago, she had invited him to stay with her until he found more permanent lodging. The permanent lodging he ended up finding was her guest room. He of course paid rent and was a good housemate in most regards. He kept his quarters relatively clean and made sure to cook his friend dinner whenever he could. Which had become a more rare occurrence the past couple of years as he let himself slip away into the shadowy corners of every tavern in the Day Court.And then there was the job she had found him. Emissary to the Day Court. Relations between Dawn and Day had always been good, but not as good as those of Day and Night. Thesan was feeling particularly put out by that knowledge, so who better to hire than a former emissary to the Night Court? Initially, Thesan wanted him to be the link between Dawn and Night, but Lucien refused. He would rather witness thousands of Helion’s orgies in Day Court than step one foot into the Night Court ever again.He had mostly enjoyed learning his new role within Dawn and Day. It was occasionally tedious and Nuan was right, his personal habits did occasionally get in the way. Like this morning.“Shit,” Lucien said again. “I’ve got a meeting with Helion at half past one.”“Right,” Nuan said and pushed the cup of tea into his hands. “Which is why I woke you now. Gives us plenty of time to discuss the heathen you’ve become while still allowing you time to winnow to Day.”Lucien took another small sip of tea as Nuan sat on the foot of the bed and crossed her hands in her lap. She wasn’t leaving, or letting him leave for that matter, until they had it out.“How fortunate,” Lucien grumbled. “An intervention is always such a nice way to start the day.”“Hey,” she snapped and pinched his toes through the blankets. “What did I just say about not being a baby?”“Ow,” he mumbled and moved his feet out of the range of her attack. “I’m sorry, okay? I know I’m a mess right now, I just need time.”“Time? Really? Five years isn’t enough time for you to pull your head out of your ass and get your life together?”Lucien frowned and glared at his friend. “Five years is nothing to fae. I thought you were a woman of science, shouldn’t you know that?”“Now who’s being mean?” Nuan crossed her arms. “Five years is plenty of time. You’re not going to start feeling any better if you don’t try to feel better.”Lucien felt himself deflate at her words. He stared at her for a moment and then whispered, “What if I don’t want to feel better?”His thoughts flashed back to all of the things that he had worked past to feel better. Was it worth it? Pushing down the memories of his father’s rage, Jesminda’s death, his fractured friendship with Tamlin… his mating bond with Elain. He had forced himself to “feel better” about all of it so he might have a life outside of misery. And what did that get him? More misery.“Oh, Lucien,” she whispered reaching a hand out to cup his cheek. “It won’t always be like this. I promise you will feel better someday.” She continued, “I’m just your friend and I’m worried about you. I want to help.”“I know,” he said, gently removing her hand from his face and giving it a small, affectionate peck. “Why don’t you set up that date with the friend you’ve been begging me to go out with?”She looked at him hesitantly as she withdrew her hand from his grasp. Nuan thought about everything so thoroughly, Lucien often thought he could see her thoughts forming.“Are you sure? If you do this, you absolutely have to stop being such a rake. She is a dear friend and I would hate to think how sad you would look in the streets if I were to be forced to kick you out for breaking her heart.”Lucien put his hand over his heart, feigning astonishment. “You wouldn’t,” he said.Nuan smirked at him, “don’t test me.”“I won’t have to,” Lucien said swinging his legs out from under the blankets and over the side of the bed. “I’m moving out.”He looked back at Nuan, her mouth now open in surprise. “That’s not what I meant,” she exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air.“I know, I know,” he said as he stood up and stretched. He turned back to look at her, “but it is kind of what you meant, right?”She shifted her gaze away and shrugged her shoulders. Lucien chuckled, she was too nice to ever actually kick him out, even if she wanted to. And he knew she wanted to. He had started to pick up the scent of a different female on her around six months back, and it was just getting stronger.He leaned down and grabbed her chin, making her look at him. “Nuan, it is seriously fine. You deserve to have your home back after all this time. You need privacy to do whatever,” he said, pausing with a smirk. “And whoever you’d like.”She scowled, batting his hand away. “I knew you knew,” she mumbled, clearly annoyed she’d been figured out.“They don’t call me the fox of Prythian for nothing,” he said, turning his back to her as he went to his closet.“No one calls you that,” she said and got up to follow him to his closet.He muttered his disagreement as they both perused his wardrobe. While Thesan tended to prefer that Lucien wore Dawn colors while performing his emissary duties, he allowed him to keep his preferred style. Lucien snagged a pair of light brown trousers while Nuan grabbed a pale blue tunic and a deep, golden vest. They each threw their contributions onto his messy bed.Before turning to go, Nuan grabbed his hand. “Are you sure you’re ready for all of this? I don’t want to push you too far.”Lucien swallowed before responding, “I’m not, but I don’t think I’ll ever be ready if I don’t push myself. Can’t wallow in misery forever, right?”She gazed at him cautiously, “right.”“Well then it’s decided,” he said as he shooed her out of his chambers. “I’ll try to get my life back on track and you can start getting serious about this new lady in your life.”She turned around to give him a light slap on the wrist but was met with the door as he closed it in her face. He rested his head against the door and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. He could try to feel better again, right? Surely, he couldn’t have another miserable outcome? He figured he was owed some small amount of happiness at this point.Sighing, he shook his head and walked back over to his bed to get dressed before winnowing to the Day Court for his monthly meeting with the High Lord himself.
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Lucien arrived on the stairs of the Day Court palace five minutes before his meeting with Helion was scheduled to start. Past Lucien would have chastised him for being late and not being able to be one step ahead of things. Present day Lucien was patting himself on the back for arriving before the meeting started and without the nausea of a hangover roiling in his guts.All of that wasn’t to say that Lucien was bad at his job. He was just easily distracted these days and had let his baser tendencies run rampant. Things hadn’t started out like this when he had arrived in the Dawn Court five years prior. Lucien had really, truly made an effort to start over after he left the Night Court. He would exercise, go out with Nuan and her friends, and study up on the court’s practices. He even learned how to fortify his mental shields against the mating bond to save himself some of the heartache that would come for him when she eventually broke the bond. For the first six months, all of his plans were going incredibly well. That was until Feyre showed up.As promised, he had written to her when he arrived and settled in Dawn. He kept it brief, letting her know he appreciated her friendship and hoped they could continue that friendship from his new home. Her response took weeks to arrive and was blunt when it did. Feyre was upset that he had left without telling her or anyone other than Rhys. Of course if he read between the lines, she meant that she was upset that he had not bothered to tell Elain of his departure. He ignored that portion of the letter in his response and instead simply asked she send news when her child was born. Instead of responding to that letter, she showed up at his doorstep six months later. It had been an awkward encounter to say the least given Nuan had been the one to open the door and was obviously not expecting the High Lady of the Night Court on her doorstep.He had of course invited her in and Nuan made herself scarce. They sat at the small kitchen table in silence as they both sipped steaming hot tea.“So,” Lucien began. “How’s the little one?”A soft smile graced Feyre’s features. “Nyx,” she said. “He’s perfect. A handful at times, but he’s still perfect.”“Well, I’d expect nothing less than a handful given who his father is,” Lucien said with a smirk.Feyre reached out and flicked his forearm causing them both to laugh, finally breaking the tension. They chatted lightly about this and that, mostly her about Nyx and him about life in the Dawn Court. Finally, Feyre’s face settled into a seriousness that he knew was coming.“I’m still mad at you, you know,” she said.Lucien looked away and gave a small nod. “I know and for what it’s worth, I am sorry for how things turned out. But it is truly for the best.”“Is it?” Feyre asked.Lucien paused ever so briefly before responding, “yes. It is.”Feyre attempted a smile at that but the corners of her mouth fought against her and pursed her lips into a frown.He sighed, “and what is it that you really came to discuss, Feyre?”It was her turn to look away. She appeared to be gathering her thoughts, trying to word what she needed to tell him correctly.“For Cauldron’s sake Feyre, what is it?” Lucien questioned, becoming inpatient with her silence.Feyre slowly turned back to look at him, “I wanted you to hear this from me before it becomes gossip circulating the courts.”Lucien’s heart dropped at her words. He had told himself repeatedly that he was ready for this conversation, that he knew it was coming.He cleared his throat, “I gather Elain and the shadowsinger are together?”Feyre nodded weakly, “engaged, actually.”Flames erupted from Lucien’s fingertips, leaving scorch marks on the pale pink tablecloth. Feyre winced but didn’t move from her seat“Shit,” he said as he patted the dying embers.He had known this moment was coming, but apparently he hadn’t been as prepared as he thought. A black pit had opened up within him and was slowly trying to consume his very being.Feyre reached across the table to grab his hand, pulling him from his thoughts, “I’m sorry, Lucien. I wanted things to turn out differently. But if they can’t, then I wanted to be the one to tell you.”“How generous of you, High Lady,” Lucien replied, dryly.Feyre frowned and slapped the hand she had been holding, “that’s not fair. I am just the messenger.”“Well, messenger. Message has been received. Thanks so much for popping in,” he said as he stood so quickly his chair fell over.Feyre’s frown deepened as she glared at him from her spot at the table. He noticed she wasn’t getting up.“What? Is there something else you need to tell me?” Lucien asked, worry infiltrating his voice as his righted his chair and sat back down.“Do you have anything we could add to this tea to make it a little stronger?” Feyre asked as she swirled the remaining tea in her cup.Without saying a word, Lucien snapped his fingers and a bottle of fire whisky appeared. He poured a sizable amount in both of their teacups. She gulped it down and gestured for him to refill her cup before she finally spoke.“Elain has decided she won’t break the bond,” Feyre said, unable to meet his gaze. “She doesn’t want to risk hurting you or driving you insane.”Lucien downed the rest of his tea and then drank three large swallows directly from the whisky bottle.“Ah,” he said. “How incredibly kind of her.”“I do think her intentions are kind, she just doesn’t fully understand the mating bond,” she said.“And why should she?” Lucien asked bitterly. “It’s not as if she has a mate.”“Lucien, I understand this is hard for you, but would stop being such an ass?”He bit his tongue before he could spit out a retort and gave her a sad, half smile.“Touché.”And that was that. Feyre hadn’t visited the Dawn Court again after that day, but he occasionally saw her and the Inner Circle at solar court meetings and the like where they engaged in meaningless small talk. Did he miss their friendship and regret that he wasn’t around to watch her son grow up? Yes. Did he regret his decision to leave? Absolutely not.As Lucien sat on the steps of the Day Court palace, ruminating over his past, the sound of footsteps tore him from his thoughts and put him in high alert. They weren’t the footsteps he was used to hearing that signaled it was his turn to meet with Helion. The steps he usually heard were somehow heavy and light at the same time as if the shadows that surrounded Azriel somehow managed to muffle the movements of the large warrior.Today was different. The footsteps he had grown so accustomed to hearing were replaced by something more pronounced but still soft while also very hurried. Before he had a chance to consider who it might be, he whipped his head around to see the last person in the world he had imagined to find.Elain had paused her delicate yet speedy walk and was staring at him, dumbstruck. She wore a deep blue gown with silver thread that shone brightly in the light of Day. Her hands were furiously wringing the material of said gown as she continued to stare at him with her an unblinking stare. If he hadn’t been so mesmerized, he might’ve found it unnerving. This was the first time he had truly seen her in five years and she was just as beautiful as he remembered. And also not his to admire, he reminded himself as his eyes found the large rose gold and diamond ring sitting on her finger.Lucien stood from his spot on the stairs and cleared his throat, “Lady.”She nodded and kept looking at him. She stared with such intensity that he thought maybe he had burst into flames. He waited just a moment to see if she would say anything, even if he knew it was futile.As she remained glued to her spot, Lucien rallied his wits to leave her presence. He gave her a curt nod of his head and started walking toward the palace.Just as he was about to turn the corner toward the High Lord’s quarters, he stopped dead in his tracks. Because for the first time, maybe ever, his mate called his name.
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5 years later (Elain)The first rays of daylight danced across Elain’s eyes as her lids fluttered open. She sighed and stretched, reaching for the other side of the bed. Her heart dropped as the cold pillow sent all of her memories flooding back into her sleep-addled mind.He was gone. She knew he would be gone, but the sadness flooded in anyway. After four and a half years of marriage to Azriel, things seemed to finally be over. And if she was truly honest with herself, they had been over for far longer than that.After her mate left the Night Court, there had been some unspoken permission for Azriel to officially pursue her. He had apologized profusely for calling their near kiss a mistake and promised to love her forever. Within six months of the start of their relationship, they were engaged and wed in quick succession. The first six months of their marriage was filled with love and passion. It only fizzled out after their first Winter Solstice as a married couple when Elain noticed something about one of the guests in attendance.Nesta’s friend, Gwyn, was wearing a very familiar necklace. A delicate chain adorned with a beautiful, simple rose. As soon as she noticed it around the young priestess’s neck, all of the air was sucked from her lungs. She excused herself to go step outside, to see if maybe the room just had a lack of oxygen. Being outside didn’t help. She felt like she was drowning on dry land.She wasn’t sure how long she stayed outside. Five minutes or an hour? It didn’t matter because it didn’t help. And when she went back inside, she realized no one, not even her husband, seemed to have realized she left. So, she did what she did best. She plastered a fake smile to her face. She laughed with everyone when Cassian opened his gift from Nesta to reveal some type of male lingerie. She even graciously thanked her husband when he gifted her a gold bracelet sculpted from tiny vines that crawled up her wrist when she put it on. It felt like a prison. But instead of screaming and crying and throwing it back at him, she said she loved it and gave him a peck on the cheek. No one was the wiser.It was only once they got back to the town house, which was a wedding gift from Feyre and Rhys, that she let go. As soon as her feet crossed the threshold in their home, she felt the burn of tears falling down her face, stinging her cheeks. To his credit, Azriel did realize something was wrong immediately. He just had no idea what was wrong.He held her gently as she cried with his wings curled around her protectively. He whispered soothing words in her ear and pet her hair. When she finally caught her breath, she pulled away ever so slightly from his embrace to look him in the eyes. His gaze was so full of love that she almost stopped herself from confronting him thinking that somehow she had been mistaken.Finally, she asked, “why did I see Nesta’s friend Gwyn wearing the necklace you got me for Solstice last year?”Azriel’s body went rigid as soon as the question registered. He looked like he wanted to run away, but he stayed steady and held her gaze.“Elain, I’m so sorry. I gave it to Clotho at the library to give to one of her staff as a gift after you gave it back to me. By the time you and I were finally able to be together, the necklace was gone and I forgot about it. I didn’t even notice Gwyn wearing it tonight,” he explained.He stared into her eyes with such reverence and spoke with such truth that she believed him and didn’t question his story. They were able to mostly go back to normal for another year or so until Elain saw Gwyn wearing that necklace again and was stricken by such a strong vision, it reminded her of when she was first Made.She Saw Azriel holding the hand of a pale female. He was dressed immaculately in fine black clothing, similar to what Cassian wore for his mating ceremony with Nesta. His hand that was unoccupied by the female’s was being offered a small chocolate cake. Right as he was putting it up to this mouth, her Vision shifted and morphed into the most beautiful sunny day. Red and gold glittered in the light before her vision went completely dark.Elain woke up on the floor of the River House surrounded by her family. Nesta was screaming and squeezing her hand with such a strong grip, she was worried her fingers might break. Through some miracle, she was able to convince everyone she had just fainted. Because why would sweet, innocent Elain lie?After that moment, she had never been able to bring herself to look at Azriel the same way. He had a mate out there who he was going to find someday and he would leave her for that mate. Their relationship felt like a ticking time bomb, but she never brought it up. She couldn’t. No one knew she was still having visions and she wasn’t ready for what would happen if they did. So instead, she bottled it up and prayed to the Mother the future would change. It had changed before, hadn’t it? Cassian was alive. So maybe, just maybe, Azriel wouldn’t find his mate and she could keep him.So, instead of telling anyone, she kept it to herself thinking maybe she could change the future. But as time went on and tension grew in their relationship, sometimes she stopped thinking about trying to change the future. It wasn’t that she wanted Azriel to find his mate, it was just that she realized after a time that she wasn’t as happy as she thought she could be and she was fairly confident he felt the same way. Two years into their marriage, they stopped having weekly dinner dates. They both told themselves it was because they were too busy, but Elain knew the truth. She knew that if they had a date night, they would find themselves with nothing to talk about.All of that wasn’t to say that she didn’t love him, because she did love him. She loved that he knew when to give her space and when to be a shoulder to cry on. She loved that he would stand out in the garden with her on sunny days and use his wings to shield her from the most powerful rays. But, she was coming to realize that wasn’t everything she wanted in a relationship. Sometimes, she wanted to be allowed to burn in the heat of the midday sun without the shield of her husband.Though she was having these thoughts more and more frequently, she never shared them with Azriel. She just assumed that what she was feeling was normal. She assumed that the honeymoon phase couldn’t last forever. And she had convinced herself she was okay with that until four months ago when Rhysand showed up at the town house looking half crazed.“Elain,” he said, breathlessly. “I need you to come with me to the House.”Fear paralyzed her. Azriel had been on a mission and had been gone longer than expected. “What is it? Is he hurt?”Rhys shook his head. “No, no, he’s not injured. But you do need to come with me now.”She looked at him hesitantly before grabbing her cloak and following him to the street where he picked her up to fly her to the House. When they arrived, she could hear hushed and frantic voices, spiking her fear once again. But as soon as she entered the dining room, she realized her sisters and both Cassian and Azriel were accounted for. They all turned to silently stare at her as Rhys set her down.“Is everything okay?” She feared she already knew the answer.They all stayed silent for a moment longer before Cassian chimed in. “Why don’t we give you two a moment to speak alone?”She didn’t miss Nesta’s glare at him as he spoke. Feyre also seemed reluctant to leave but eventually stood up and grabbed Nesta to take her with her. Rhys nodded to them and followed the others out. Finally, she was alone with her husband. Her husband who was currently having a very hard time looking her in the eyes.“Azriel?” Elain said quietly as she went to go take the seat next to him. His cheeks turned a deep shade of red and he turned his body away from her. Suddenly, her vision from years past flashed before her eyes and she knew exactly what had happened.“You have a mate, don’t you?”He whipped around so quickly to look at her that he almost fell from his chair.“Did Rhys tell you?” He all but growled the words.Elain shook her head, debating how much she wanted to reveal. No one in the Inner Circle knew she was still having visions, and she wasn’t confident that she wanted them to know.“No,” Elain lied. “It was a guess, but it seems as though I’m correct based on your response.”“It’s Gwyn,” he whispered, eyes glued to the table.Her heart dropped into her stomach. The priestess? The one who he had given her necklace to all those years ago? Elain had suspected over the years that it might be her, but now her fears were coming true.“Does she know?” Elain asked, stiffly.“Yes,” he replied. “Apparently she has known for quite some time.”She bristled at his words. Had Gwyn known before Elain had wed Azriel? Or had it hit her after the fact? Elain sighed and supposed the when didn’t matter much at this point.“What are you going to do about it?” Elain asked, suddenly very interested in picking the dirt from under her nails that had accumulated in the garden this morning.His scarred hand reached out and grabbed hers, stopping her from picking. She looking to meet his gaze.“You are my wife, Elain,” he said. “I made a vow to you and I do not intend to break it.”Elain was unable to hide her surprise at his answer. She had assumed he was going to tell her that their marriage was done and that he was going to pursue the priestess.So, on they went for a couple of months, pretending he did not have a mate. Their relationship became more and more strained every day, but they were both seemingly content to ignore the icy silence that lay between them.Finally, after months of walking on egg shells around each other, Elain had had enough. She first went to Feyre and asked her for a job. Feyre was clearly surprised at Elain’s request but immediately offered her a position as emissary to the Day Court. The High Lady claimed that she was doing it as a favor to Azriel to take work off his plate, but Elain knew it was because Feyre could sense the tension that had grown between the two. She knew she needed an outlet. Something new.With her newfound position, she went home that night ready to have the conversation that had been a long time coming. When Azriel got home, he found her sitting next to a roaring fire. He began to give her his typical hello and goodbye which involved him giving her a kiss on the cheek before going upstairs to clean up and read. This time, she caught his hand when he kissed her.“We need to talk,” she said.
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“This isn’t working,” Elain said as she starred at her husband who sat in the armchair across from her. “And let’s face it, it hasn’t been working for a while now. Even before you found out about her.”They both knew to which her she was referring.Azriel stayed silent for a while. It wasn’t uncommon for him. She had noticed over the years that he liked to take time to truly think things over before he responded.“You’re right,” he said. His wings seemed to droop with the admission.She sat there, unsure of what to say. Truthfully, she hadn’t expected him to concede so easily. She had thought he might fight it, but the fight seemed to have left him. She wanted to cry about it. Scream about it. But that’s not what Elain did, right? She was supposed to be a lady. And ladies didn’t get upset, even when their marriage was over.So instead of crying and screaming, she simply said, “I’d like to keep the town house for myself.”He nodded, “I’ll move up to the House again.”And that was that. Their marriage was over. No tears, no yelling, no harsh words. It was just over.Their family, however, that was another story. Between all of them, they certainly managed to shed tears, shout, and curse. Feyre, Nesta, and Cassian. In that order.Given that that was the current climate of the Night Court, Elain felt it a blessing when she was finally summoned to serve as emissary to the Day Court. She had met their High Lord, Helion, at several occasions and while he was often quite lewd, she still found him quite charming.For her first meeting with Helion, Feyre winnowed her to the palace of the Day Court. She didn’t like the idea of being toted around, but it was her only option.“Do you think I could learn to winnow?” Elain asked as they emerged on the gleaming white marble stairs of the palace.Feyre looked at her, seemingly taken aback by her question. Elain realized immediately that it had been a mistake to ask.“It’s quite difficult to learn,” Feyre said, clearly trying to be diplomatic. “But maybe we could try sometime once things settle down?”That was the closest Feyre could ever come to telling Elain ‘no’. Instead of fighting back, Elain bottled up her anger and placed it amongst the rest of the countless emotions that she caged. She nodded her thanks and walked away as Feyre promised to pick her up as soon as the meeting was complete.As Elain walked down the gleaming hallways of the Day Court palace, she couldn’t help but think how nice it would be to live there. The sun shone brightly in the sky and warmed her while a gentle breeze swept through to cool her. And the plants. She couldn’t help but notice that each stone pillar was decorated with crawling ivy that was peppered with tiny red flowers she had never seen before. It wasn’t a color of red that she had ever seen before in flowers. It wasn’t a bright red but almost an auburn color that was more typically seen in hair than flora. They looked out of place in the Day Court. She thought they might look more at home in Autumn.She froze as she starred at the flowers. They had reminded her of a certain redhead that she had tried and tried not to think about. Though if she let herself think about it, she found she thought he really did have beautiful hair. And a beautiful face.She shook her head to rid herself of such silly thoughts. She had made her choice years ago and she needed to live with it no matter what the silly tether in her chest tried to tell her.Elain had seriously considered breaking the bond at various times over the years, but she always came back to her initial decision which was to leave it be. She didn’t want to risk being the cause of someone’s insanity. And, selfishly, she was scared of what losing the bond might do to her. It had been the only constant thing in her life since being Made. The constant thrum of the golden tether kept her grounded when she felt like she might float away on a strong breeze. Although these days, she barely felt the bond. She could feel the layers and layers of walls that had been built up on the other end of the bridge between their souls. It was lonely, but she didn’t blame him. Of course he should protect himself from the female who shot him down but was too scared to cut him out entirely.She was suddenly shaken from her thoughts as the sound of loud flapping and clattering hooves came up behind her. Quickly, she dodged out of the way to hide behind a pillar thinking she was being attached only to turn and realize the perpetrator was simply the High Lord arriving to their meeting.“Good morning, sunshine,” Helion boomed from atop his pegasus.Elain blushed and then curtsied. She had forgotten just how brazen Helion could be.Helion scoffed at her curtsy. “I’ll have none of that. The great Seer shouldn’t bow to a lowly High Lord.”Elain’s jaw dropped at his statement. No one outside of the Night Court was supposed to know of her powers.“Ah,” Helsion said with a smirk. “Thank you for confirming my suspicions. Rhysand may be sneaky, but I am sneakier.”Elain couldn’t help but giggle at his comments which clearly made Helion all the more proud of his entrance. He stepped down off of his mount and grabbed her hand to press a kiss to her knuckles.“So glad we’re finally doing this,” Helion said. “That husband of yours is certainly something to look at but he doesn’t blush nearly as pretty as you do.”Her smile fell at the mention of Azriel. Of course Helion wouldn’t know their marriage was over. It wasn’t something one typically advertised to High Lords in neighboring courts.“Trouble in paradise?” Helion asked as he studied her reaction.“You could say that,” Elain responded. “We’ve actually gone our separate ways.”He frowned at that. “I’m sorry, my dear. Would you like me to have one of my winged friends trample him?” Helion asked, waving to the pegasus behind him.“That is quite alright,” Elain assured him.“Well you let me know if you change your mind,” Helion said. “In the meantime, shall we get down to business? I believe you’re here to discuss ongoing relations between our courts and the human realm.”Elain nodded in agreement and followed him to a large office. The word office was generous for the room she found herself in. It had a door and a sort of desk, but that was where the similarities between Helion and Rhysand’s offices stopped. For starters, Helion’s office had no walls. Instead, each of the four sides of the room was draped in a lovely, gauzy material that could be tied up to let the entire world in. The space was also covered in more of those tiny red flowers to the point where one could barely see the pillars beneath the ivy.“What type of flower is that?” Elain asked as they both settled into plush, round seats.“Ah,” Helion said as a sad smile graced his features. “You won’t find it in any other court. I had it specially curated to remind me of someone. I call it Amabella.”“It’s quite lovely,” Elain said as she straightened her skirts. She wasn’t used to sitting in such a round chair. It seemed to beg whoever sat there to curl up and relax.“It is, isn’t it? I’d be happy to send you home with a couple of clippings if you think it would suit your own garden,” he offered.Elain agreed and nodded her thanks. Finally, they began their discussion regarding future aid to the human realm. Elain explained her connections and ways in which she thought the humans could best be helped. Helion listened intently and shared his own dealings with both Queen Vassa and Jurian. Vassa was ruling justly with Jurian by her side as her consort. But they could still use help rebuilding as well as integrating human life with faerie life in a lasting, fair manner.They chatted and shared ideas for the better part of an hour before Helion apologetically ended their meeting in order to get onto his next. She left his office feeling lighter than the air itself. She hadn’t been able to speak so freely and had someone listen to her so genuinely in such a long time. Maybe ever. And it was the most freeing thing in the world.She was so caught up in her own thoughts that she didn’t even register the thumping noise that had started as she made her way toward where Feyre would pick her up. Or maybe she did and thought it was some Day Court tradition to play drums around noon. Either way, she certainly wasn’t expecting to see the mate she had scorned five years ago sitting on the steps of the palace. She couldn’t help but stare at him. He somehow simultaneously looked both wildly out of place and completely at home, his red hair gleaming vibrantly in the strong noon sun.As she stared at him, he saw him start to turn before her whole body turned cold and her vision went black. Through the darkness, the sun started to shine and a radiant golden glow filled her vision. The glow settled into a solid circle, placed upon red hair. The hands that set the crown upon the head were a deep tan, molded by the sun itself.As quickly as it came, the Vision violently disappeared and Elain found herself thrust back into reality with said scorned mate staring back at her. He gave her a sad smile and started toward the palace. She turned to watch him go when what she had Seen became abundantly clear.“Lucien,” Elain felt herself call out before she had time to stop herself.She watched as Lucien paused and slowly turned to look at her. In that moment, she realized that was the first time she had ever spoken his name. She was surprised to realize she liked how it felt.“Lady?” Lucien asked without broaching the space between them.“Your father,” she started to say. “He isn’t who you think he is.”“Ah,” Lucien said, grimacing. “I assure you, my father is exactly who I think he is.”Before she could explain or even say another word, he turned his back and continued down the hall toward the office she had just come from. Toward who she had just realized was his father.
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“Your father,” she said. “He isn’t who you think he his.”His heart twisted at her words. They hadn’t seen each other, let alone spoken in five years and that’s what she chose to say to him? Everyone knew exactly who Beron was. His true colors were apparent at all times.“Ah,” he replied, venom lacing his words. “I assure you, my father is exactly who I think he is.”With that, he turned to leave her, unwilling to allow her to say anything else. She had no right popping into his life unannounced right as he was making an effort to strongly consider moving on.His thoughts clouded his vision, causing him to walk directly into a brick wall. A very warm brick wall. He looked up. No - not a brick wall. Just a large, smug High Lord.“Lucien!” Helion exclaimed patting him on the back. “My favorite seventh son of Beron Vanserra.”“So also your least favorite seventh son, then?” Lucien asked, taking a few steps back from the male he had just run into.“Exactly,” Helion said with a smirk. “Come into my office and we can chat about Dawn Court business and that lovely mate of yours.”Lucien froze at the words. “She’s not my mate.”He spoke without even realizing what had come out of his mouth. Of course she was still his mate. It didn’t matter that she ignored him and preferred another. She would be his mate for the rest of his life and he would be hers. Only death could part them. Or perhaps the powerful Spell-Cleaver in front of him.Helion scoffed, “Elain most certainly is your mate and the new emissary of the Night Court.”It was not often that Lucien was left speechless. His jaw hung open as he wracked his brain for something to say. Emissary? His counterpart in the other solar court was now Elain?“Careful,” Helion said, smirk once again plastered to his face. “You’re going to start catching flies soon if you don’t shut your mouth.”Lucien closed his mouth and drew his face into a scowl before growling out the words, “what do you mean emissary?”“Why, Lucien, do I need to provide you with a job description for a position you’ve held for the last 200 years?” Helion asked with a laugh.Lucien glared at him a moment longer before turning on his heel to leave. His job be damned, he wouldn’t deal with this. As he started his walk back out of the palace, he was again met with a brick wall as Helion winnowed directly in front of him.“Really?” Helion asked. “Don’t be such a baby. I would hate to have to tell Thesan his emissary has gone rogue. You’d be exiled from yet another court. Which maybe you want, it’s so hard to tell at this point.”“Are you threatening me?” Lucien snarled.Helion pretended to consider this. “I suppose I am.”Lucien continued grumbling but turned back toward Helion’s office. “Then lead the way and I’d be thrilled to discuss our ongoing trade agreements.”Helion clapped him on the back. “That’s the spirit!”Silently, they made their way down the bright corridor. Lucien could feel Helion glancing over at him multiple times during the short walk. By the time they settled in his office, he was flat out staring.“Now what?” Lucien asked as he tried to make himself comfortable in the absurd chairs that decorated Helion’s office. Even after all of these years he had no idea how one was supposed to sit in one and look even somewhat dignified.Helion looked like he was pretending to be nonchalant. He glanced at his fingernails as if searching for imperfections before saying, “you know they’re separating, right? The marriage is over.”Lucien’s heart rate quickened and he hated himself for it. He shouldn’t care what her relationship status was. She didn’t want him and, at this point, the feeling was mutual no matter what his body told him.So, instead of responding to that, Lucien began their usual conversation. “Thesan would like to understand why you have decided to implement a tax on upcoming exports.”Helion looked at him and frowned. “Gods you really are no fun.”Lucien simply held his gaze and raised an eyebrow. They had played this game many times over the years Lucien had been working for the Dawn Court. Lucien would try to discuss Thesan’s agenda, Helion would try to gossip, Lucien would stare at him until Helion got uncomfortable listening to Lucien’s golden eye click, and then Helion would cave and discuss actual manners of business.“Fine,” Helion whined. “What does Thesan want now? Lower taxes?”Lucien blew out a breath, relieved Helion was finally on topic. They continued to discuss ongoing trade negotiations for the better part of an hour. Of all the High Lords that Lucien had worked with, he found Helion to be the sharpest. He kept Lucien on his toes in a way few others did, even when he diverged from the agreed upon topics to idle gossip.“Same time next week?” Helion asked as he stood to officially adjourn their meeting.“Do I have any other option?” Lucien asked, only half joking.“Nope,” Helion said with a grin.“Then I bid you farewell for now,” Lucien said with a small bow and turned to leave.As he rounded the corner out of the High Lord’s office, he heard Helion call out a final remark. “You should talk to her!”Lucien shook his head as he kept walking down the hall. Helion was ever the busybody and would likely continue to bring up his mate at their meetings for the foreseeable future.Without another thought, Lucien started to winnow back to the Dawn Court. He had a lot to do and wanted to start on it before he had a chance to change his mind. Unfortunately, he had to make multiple jumps to get all the way back to Nuan’s apartment. His first jump always placed him right on the border between the courts. He had made the trip so many times that he didn’t think much before jumping. This time, he was especially distracted by thoughts of Elain, try as he might to banish them from his mind.He was in fact so distracted that he didn’t realize he was being pulled from his winnow by a familiar fire. He felt his own flame rise up, like calling to like. Even before emerging from the darkness, he knew who had caught him.“Hello, little brother,” Eris hissed in his ear.
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His eldest brother’s hand was wrapped in a flaming vice around Lucien’s bicep.“Brother,” Lucien said as he wriggled in his grasp. “So good to see you. To what do I own this pleasure?”“Can’t I just want to see you?” Eris asked as he spun Lucien around to face him. A smirk graced his face.“That’s not really our style,” Lucien said as he continued to fight his brother’s iron grip.“I suppose not,” Eris said as he released Lucien’s arm.Finally free, Lucien took two steps back and glared at Eris. His brother was always one to dress immaculately, no matter the occasion. He was dressed particularly sharp today in forest green trousers and a dark brown jacket. Who knew one had to get so dressed up to abduct their own brother?“What the fuck do you want, Eris?” Lucien asked. “And how the fuck did you know exactly where I would be?”It was very difficult to catch someone out of their winnow. You had to know the exact instant a person would start and stop their jump.“My, my, so curious today, aren’t we?” Eris clucked. “What the fuck do I want? To tell you that Atlas died last week. How the fuck did I know where you would be? By the Caludron, it was easy. Every time your emotions are on edge and you winnow, I can see you ripping through time like a beacon. You should learn to control yourself.”For the second time that afternoon, Lucien’s jaw hung open. He didn’t particularly care for his second oldest brother, or any of his brothers for that matter, but to hear that he had died second-hand was difficult to stomach. He had become so far removed from his family over the years that he had to learn of the death of a brother a week after it had happened.“What happened?” Lucien choked out, his flame extinguishing as his shoulders sagged.“A tragic accident. He had his had a bit too close to the guillotine that father was using. You know how he loves to take heads.”Lucien’s eyes burned with tears at the ghastly reminder of Jesminda’s death. His father, Beron, had savagely beheaded his love among countless others who he had perceived as wronging him. But to take the head of his own son? That was a new low, one that he didn’t think even Beron would stoop to.“What did he do?” Lucien asked. “What could Atlas possibly have done that made father execute him?”“I’m afraid that’s classified,” Eris said, seemingly wholly unaffected by their brother’s death. Instead, he seemed to be checking his nails for imperfections.“Then why the fuck did you tear me from my winnow to tell me he was dead?” Lucien asked, becoming exasperated with the conversation.Eris paused, seeming to truly consider Lucien’s question. He chose his next words carefully.“There’s another war coming, baby brother. And it’s coming for all of us. Best be prepared.”And with that, Eris was gone as suddenly as he had arrived. Lucien was left completely confused and somewhat heartbroken for the second time that day.He threw his focus into winnowing back to the Dawn Court, trying to put a tamper on his emotions so as to not appear as a beacon as Eris so eloquently put it. He was so exhausted and uninterested in seeing anyone, even Nuan, that he broke through the wards of his bedroom to winnow directly into his bed. Lucien had always had a knack for twisting spells together and breaking them apart, but that power had been increasing with every year of his immortal life. At first, he had written it off as an unintentional bonus of having an eye crafted by a master tinkerer. However, after doing a little light research, also known as asking Nuan about it, he found that all of the abilities he was discovering couldn’t be solely from the eye. Sure, his heightened ability to see glamours and spells was thanks to his eye, but that’s all his eye did. It heightened a sense that was already present.As he lay in bed, still fully in traveling gear, he focused only on reweaving the intricate spells of the other wards he had placed and strengthened during his years living with Nuan. Only when he finished did he remember that he was supposed to be moving out and should therefore be focusing on things other than protecting what would soon just be Nuan’s guest bedroom again.Instead of getting up to start getting his life together as he had promised Nuan, frustration kept him pinned to his bed. Why on the day when he had decided to clean up his act did both his mate and his brother have to pop up? Nothing made Lucien want to drown his sorrows more than those two individuals. He desperately wanted to head down to his favorite tavern and lose himself for the rest of the day,While he couldn’t quite bring himself to break his promise to Nuan and go raking around the south side of the Dawn Court, he also couldn’t bring himself to do any of the other things he told her he would do. Like find a new place to live. So, instead of conducting himself poorly or making real progress, he chose a third option. And that option was to lay in bed and stare at the ceiling for an unreasonable amount of time.In fact, it ended up being such an unreasonable amount of time that he fell asleep and didn’t wake up until it was dark and there was a pounding on his door.“Lucien!” Nuan shouted as she kept knocking. “What is going on in there?”“What?” Lucien asked as he staggered sleepily toward the door. “Hold on.”As he tried to open the door, he found the source of Nuan’s annoyance. He had unintentionally strengthened the wards so much that he had sealed himself into his room. Quickly, he broke the wards that kept the door shut. Right as the last one broke, Nuan came bursting in.“What the hell, Lucien?” Nuan said, mismatched arms crossed over her chest.Lucien at least had the decency to look sheepish. “I guess I weaved a couple more spells than were necessary for the wards.”“No shit,” Nuan said, crinkling her nose. “Speaking of shit, what’s got you smelling like smoke? And what happened to your shirt?”Lucien’s mechanical eye clicked slowly as it tried to blink away the sleep and focus on the patch of his tunic that Nuan was referring to. Sure enough, a burned handprint marred his tunic right around his bicep.“Ah,” Lucien said. “That. It’s nothing.”She raised an eyebrow. “Doesn’t look or smell like nothing.”“I was just being clumsy as usual,” he responded, even though he knew that she knew he was lying.“Sure,” she said and turned to leave.He started to close the door before her mechanical hand wrenched its way into the closing gap and pushed it open again.“Shit, you had me so distracted I almost forgot why I was bothering you,” she said, now letting herself into his room.He sighed, “please, come right in.”She smirked and walked over to his wardrobe, throwing it open as she so liked to do. He stared at her, not fully processing what she was doing going through his things at this hour. She started flinging clothes out onto his bed with no regard for where they landed.“Nuan, what are you doing?” Lucien asked as he threw a hand towards the fireplace to bring it to life.“Dressing you,” she said as though it were obvious.“I’m almost positive I’m going to regret asking, but why are you dressing me? It’s already half past six,” he said, gesturing to the fading daylight through his window.“You have a date,” she said as she brought over a dark green jacket to hold up against him. She shook her head, clearly not liking what she was seeing.Lucien’s mind raced. A date? When the hell had he agreed to a date? He wracked his brain as she continued to dump clothes onto his bed. Finally, it came to him.“Ah,” he said. “I didn’t realize when I agreed to be set up you meant tonight.”“You never specified when, so I took nailing down the details into my own hands,” she said with a shrug as she rifled through his impressive boot collection.“And what exactly are those details?” Lucien asked, settling in a chair by the fireplace.“You’re having dinner with her at that place with the spicy noodles down the block in an hour,” she replied, seeming to finally settle on an appropriate outfit.“Of course, dinner with her in an hour at the spicy noodle place,” he said as he kicked off the boots he had been wearing, and apparently sleeping in, since he got home.Nuan turned to face him, hands on her hips. “You don’t remember her name do you?”Lucien shrugged. “I could hazard a guess, but I don’t believe you’d like the outcome.”“Eira,” Nuan said as she put away the clothes that he would not be wearing tonight. “Her name is Eira and you’ve met her before, you giant rake.”“Of course I have,” Lucien said, still with no clue to whom Nuan was referring.She glared at him from across the room as she put away the last tunic she had yanked from his wardrobe.“You will be nice. You will be charming. And you will call on her again after tonight,” Nuan said, laying down the law.Lucien nodded absentmindedly, turning his attention back to the fire. He wasn’t certain he’d be the best dinner companion after the events of the day, but he’d try for Nuan’s sake. He at least owed her that.“Get changed so I can decide if the outfit will work or not,” she ordered as she headed for the door.“Fine,” he said, heaving himself up from his chair.She gave an approving nod at his upright position and left. Lucien sighed, slightly unsure of how he’d gotten himself in this situation. A situation where he saw his mate and was going on his first real date in years all in one day. Instead of thinking on it too deeply, he sighed and started changing at Nuan’s orders. It was going to be a long night.
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The “spicy noodle place”, as Lucien and Nuan affectionately referred to it as, was completely packed when he walked in. It was a small storefront restaurant, so it was usually full, but he’d never seen it quite so crowded. Every table was filled, each seat at the bar was taken, and there was still a line out the door.Lucien shook his head and sighed as he took his place in the line. Despite what everyone likely thought given his role as an emissary, he wasn’t a fan of crowds. Sure, he had grown accustomed to them over the years, but they always put him on edge. Anytime he found himself in the middle of one, he would notice his heart rate spike and his breathing would become short. Thankfully, he’d discovered ways to calm himself down. While he liked the look of the many gold rings that adorned his fingers, they were more than just stylish. When he felt his breath catch in his chest, he’d start spinning the rings on each hand from left to right until his heart rate calmed. Luckily, he was discrete enough with his fidgets that no one had ever seemed to notice. Or at least if they had, they had the decency not to comment on such a clear nervous tick.Lucien was spinning the fourth ring on his right hand when he was startled from his thoughts by a voice from behind. “Lucien?”Startled, he turned to see a tall, white-haired High Fae female standing behind him. As her glacial blue gaze met his, a memory from two years prior flashed before his eyes..~.~.~.For the fifth night that week, Lucien was drunk. This time, his excuse was that Nuan was hosting a Summer Solstice party. The other four times? Well, his excuse was the same as every other night. He wanted to.He sat in a corner of a plush pink couch in the living area, nursing another glass of whisky by the fire. His head was spinning and it was barely past dinner time, but he was content to sip his drink and listen to the conversations flow around him. In one corner, a group of Nuan’s fellow tinkerers debated a policy change regarding imported metals from other courts. In another corner, a group of mostly females giggled over a story that Nuan was animatedly reenacting. And next to him on the couch, was a female with cropped white hair. She appeared extremely formal for an event such as the one she was attending. Her posture was immaculate and she wore a cobalt jacket practically buttoned up to her chin even in the summer heat.Intrigued and uninhibited by the copious amounts of alcohol he had consumed, Lucien leaned halfway across the sofa and held his glass up in cheers to the red wine that was nestled in the stranger’s hand. Her frosty gaze shifted from where it had been pinned to the group of females to his hand. Glancing up to meet his mismatched stare, she smirked and clinked her glass against his.“What’re we drinking to?”Lucien appeared to ponder this for a moment. What was there to celebrate? The Summer Solstice? A son of Autumn could of course celebrate the solstice, but toast it? That was one step too far for Lucien’s taste no matter how long it had been since he had truly lived in his home court.So, he decided to celebrate the only thing he considered worth celebrating in that moment. “To Nuan’s expensive taste in alcohol.”“I’ll drink to that,” she said, taking a heavy drink of her very full glass.Lucien then turned his body to fully face his drinking companion. “Now I have to know. What is a Winter Court female doing celebrating the Summer Solstice in the Dawn Court?”She turned her body toward him in a similar manner and shrugged. “I could ask the same of you. What is Lucien Vanserra doing at a Dawn Court Summer Solstice party?”“Ah,” Lucien said. “So my reputation proceeds me?”“You Vanserras tend to stand out in a crowd,” she said as she finished off her drink.“Just Lucien,” he responded. “I dropped Vanserra a lifetime ago.”She nodded in apparent understanding. “So then, Just Lucien, what brings you to this particular party?”“Well,” Lucien said. “If I’m being completely honest, it’s the fact that I live here that brings me to this particular celebration. That, and of course the booze.”She looked at him, confusion pinching her features. “Really? I didn’t know Nuan had a roommate.”“I guess I should be offended she’s never mentioned me given I’ve been living here the past two years,” Lucien said, knocking back the last of his whisky.The female rolled her eyes and chuckled. “I’m Eira, by the way,” she said extending her hand to him.“Eira,” Lucien repeated. “A pleasure.” He reached out and accepted her handshake.“Fuck, your hands are cold,” Lucien swore, quickly withdrawing his hand. “It is the hottest day of the year. How is that possible?”She smiled and then held up the hand he had just touched palm side up. Ever so slowly, an ice crystal began to form in the shape of a leaf until it covered nearly half her palm. Lucien’s jaw dropped at the sight. He had seen plenty of magic over the years, so maybe it was just the alcohol, but in that moment that leaf was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.“May I?” Lucien asked, gesturing to her creation.“By all means,” she said and gently placed it into his hand.Unfortunately, sons of the Autumn Court run extremely hot and the crystal began to melt as soon as it touched his skin. It might’ve even sizzled as it dissolved.“Oh, fuck!” Lucien said and dropped it back into her hand where it instantly reformed.Eira laughed gently and shook her head. “Autumn-born,” she said. “I forgot you’ve got fire in your veins.” A smirk graced her elegant features.If Lucien had been a modest male, he might’ve blushed, but he was not a modest male. Instead, he leaned forward to whisper in her ear.“Would you like to find out?”.~.~.~.“Lucien?” Eira asked again, snapping him back to reality.“Eira,” Lucien said, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s been too long.”Her eyes squinted into a glare. “You didn’t remember who I was, did you?”Lucien put his hands up, surrendering. “I confess, my memories from that night are blurry. But now that I see you, of course I remember. I still think about that ice leaf sometimes.”She continued to glare at him but the corners of her lips quirked into a smile. “I see your compliment and will forgive you on one condition.”“And what would that be, my lady? Lucien asked, smirking.“You buy dinner,” she said, moving into the line next to him. Then she stood on her toes and whispered in his ear, “and I’m dessert.”“You’ve got a deal.”
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Elain stayed frozen in place as she watched Lucien stalk down the palace hall to the High Lord’s office. How could no one have noticed before? It was so obvious to her in that moment that the red-headed male was a son of the Day Court. His tanned skin had been almost glowing in the midday sun when she happened upon him. And that face. He had the same jawline as Helion and the same dimple in his left cheek. He also happened to have the same chip in his shoulder.And on top of how obvious it was to her, she couldn’t believe that she had just blurted it out. She hadn’t seen him in years and she immediately tried to reveal his true parentage without even greeting him. Not that she knew how to greet him at this point, or ever really. Words had always eluded her when he was near. First, she didn’t know how to talk to him. Then, she didn’t want to talk to him. Now, she couldn’t talk to him. What would she say? Apologize for ignoring him and marrying another? That wouldn’t help either of them.So, instead of chasing after him, she stood perfectly still and said nothing at all until Feyre arrived to take her back to the Night Court.“How did it go?” Feyre asked excitedly as she stepped out of her winnow. Concern creased her brow as soon as she noticed her sister standing silently on the palace steps. “Elain?”Tears burned the corners of her eyes and threatened to escape down her cheeks. She would not cry, not now. Elain needed her sister, her High Lady, to believe that she was up to the task she had been given. She couldn’t keep living her life sequestered in the Night Court, it was suffocating. Being an emissary was her only option and Elain was not about to give it up just because she might run into the last person she would want to see on a weekly basis. She enjoyed Helion and really wanted to make a difference for people. So, instead of allowing the tears to roll down her sun-kissed cheeks, she swallowed the lump in her throat and turned to smile at her sister.“Sorry,” Elain said. “I was just admiring the palace. But, yes, the meeting went well. I quite enjoyed talking with the High Lord.”Feyre’s face lit up at her words. “I knew you you would. He’s quite the charmer.”Elain had the decency to blush at her sister’s words. She of course found Helion charming, but now that she knew what she did about his life, she would never be interested in him in the way everyone else seemed to be.Feyre held out her hand, readying to winnow them back to Velaris. A lump formed in Elain’s throat. She didn’t want to go back to Velaris. It was a beautiful city, of course, but being there made her feel like she couldn’t breathe. Between the ever looming presence of her sisters and their mates as well as her now ex-husband, she felt stifled. Somebody was always watching her every move, making sure she wasn’t falling apart. And of course she wasn’t falling apart. Elain was perky and happy. She wasn’t the kind of person who screamed and raged when things didn’t go her way. She simply accepted it. Right?Feeling a spark of bravery after her meeting with High Lord, Elain took a step back from her sister’s offered hand. “Would you mind if I stayed here for a couple of days?”The crease between Feyre’s brows returned as she took another step toward Elain. “Is this about Azriel?”A flush burned Elain’s cheeks as her irritation threatened to claw through the surface. “Not everything is about Azriel,” she said. “I’d just like to enjoy some time in the sun.”Concern remained etched in Feyre’s features, but she slowly nodded. She had that far away look in her eyes that Elain associated with her mind-to-mind communication with Rhysand. “We have an open tab at the inn just outside the palace walls. You can stay there and charge whatever you need to our accounts.”Elain swallowed nervously. She never expected Feyre to say yes, let alone offer to finance her stay. While she was eager to spend time outside of the Night Court, she had absolutely no idea what she would do with herself when granted the opportunity. But she couldn’t let that stop her, so she forced another smile to her face.“Wonderful, thank you. And tell Rhysand that I say thank you as well.”A taut smile forced itself onto Feyre’s face. “Of course. I’ll come back to fetch you home in two days.”“I’ll expect you then,” Elain said, already turning to head in the general direction of the inn.“Elain?” Feyre called as Elain walked away. Elain turned back to look at her sister once more who looked like she wanted to say more, maybe even convince her to come back to Verlaine.Instead, she simply said, “I hope the sun does you some good.”Elain gave a short nod and headed on her way, the weight of the world lifting off her chest with every step she took. She could do this. She could be by herself in a foreign land for a couple of days.As she made her way to the inn, she chanted that mantra to herself, forcing herself to believe that she both was and would be okay.The streets of the capital city of the Day Court were like nothing she had ever seen before. Fae of every background crowded the narrow streets. Languages she had never heard filled her ears. While she couldn’t understand a single word that was being spoken, she felt as though she could sense the meaning behind each syllable.A couple to her left seemed to be discussing their upcoming nuptials in hushed towns as they shared a drink at an outdoor restaurant. To her right, the owner of a food cart yelled out the prices of his dishes, seemingly competing with those of the vendor down the road.Each food vendor seemed to be selling a variation of the same dish. A fluffy piece of bread filled with meat cut from what looked to be a lamb spinning over a fire. The foreign smells swam around her mind, reminding her of the hunger that growled in her stomach.She supposed that it was around the time she usually ate her lunch as she approached a vendor that appeared to be right outside her inn. A tall female with glowing, golden skin served customers at the cart. Her almost translucent wings seemed to be fanning her against the midday heat as she served each faerie that happened upon her cart.Elain smiled at the female as she finally made her way to the front of the line. The female’s golden gaze met hers with a gentleness she hadn’t expected.“What can I get you, love?”“Oh,” Elain said. “This is my first time in the city, so whatever you think I should try.”The female winked at Elain and turned to grab a fresh piece of bread, right of the fire. Elain was fascinated as the watched the strange female in front of her quickly prepare a meal. She had never seen someone work so quickly and gracefully. Not even her shadow wraith companions moved so effortlessly when they joined her in the kitchens.Not even two minutes passed before the female turned back toward Elain with a steaming plate of food.“There you are, doll” she said.“Thank you,” Elain responded as she placed three coins from her purse into the female’s extended hand.“Come back if you like it,” she called out to Elain. Unable to help herself, Elain blushed as she hurried toward the entrance to the inn.Elain took a seat at a small table in a nook in the lobby of the inn. The table was tucked into a corner next to a window that spanned the wall from floor to ceiling. She relished the warm sun on back of her neck as she tucked into her meal.Flavors that she had never tasted before bounced around her mouth as she devoured her lunch. Warming spices coated the inside of her mouth long after she finished while she still sat by the window. She knew she should check in to her room, but she was entranced by the people she watched walk by.As she sat there, the sun dimmed from view, hiding behind the now glowing palace. The small smile that had graced her face for the past hour fell as she felt a sudden emptiness fill her chest. A hole that she hadn’t even realized had been filled that afternoon returned to her as it had for the past five years. Without a second thought, she knew exactly what had happened. Lucien had left the Day Court. With a sigh, Elain went to check into her room. Suddenly, the view of the palace wasn’t as enticing as it had been.