Actions

Work Header

Rating:
Archive Warning:
Categories:
Fandoms:
Relationships:
Additional Tags:
Collections:
Language:
English
Stats:
Published:
2025-01-04
Words:
792
Chapters:
1/1

Gothams Go-To Problem

Entire Work

Work Text

Nine months in, Ghost had seamlessly taken on a secondary role as Gotham’s unofficial therapist, fixer, and all-around miracle worker. It didn’t matter if you were an alpha, omega, beta, or an indecisive barista trying to decide if oat milk was worth the hype—Ghost had you. And Gotham knew it.Here are some of the most hilarious encounters with Ghost that had the city buzzing:
1. The Alpha Who Couldn't Decide on a Tattoo

Alpha: “Look, Ghost, I need your advice. I’m thinking of getting a tattoo to honor my pack, but I can’t decide between a wolf howling at the moon or...you know, a cooler wolf howling at the moon.”

Ghost (smelling like ghost peppers): “May I suggest a minimalist design? Perhaps something symbolic rather than literal. You could incorporate geometric patterns to reflect pack unity.”

Alpha: “...Whoa. That’s deep.”

Ghost (smelling faintly of coconut now): “Also, consider a smaller design to test your pain tolerance first.”

Alpha: “Smart. Yeah, you’re good at this.”
Two weeks later, the alpha returned to Wayne Enterprises to show off a stunningly subtle tattoo of overlapping circles. Ghost remained unimpressed but nodded approvingly, smelling faintly of neutral leather.
2. The Omega and the Wedding Cake Crisis

Omega Bridezilla: “Ghost, you have to help me. The bakery canceled my cake order, and I’m getting married in TWO DAYS. I’m going to faint!”

Ghost (smelling like coconut, calm as ever): “First, breathe. Second, do you prefer buttercream or fondant?”

Bridezilla: “Buttercream. Obviously!”

Ghost: “Excellent choice. I will have a baker ready by 3 p.m. And I’ll ensure they incorporate your color palette.”
Two hours later, the omega received a message: “Cake secured. Gluten-free options included. Congratulations.”Rumor has it Ghost was invited to the wedding. They didn’t attend but sent a congratulatory scented candle—coconut, of course.
3. The Beta with the Broken Espresso Machine

Barista: “Ghost, you’re my last hope. If I can’t fix this espresso machine by morning, the coffee shop’s going to lose all its regulars.”

Ghost (smelling like ghost peppers): “Step one: unplug the machine.”

Barista: “...Wait, that’s a thing?”

Ghost: “Yes. Also, check the grinder for blockages. If all else fails, I can send a WayneTech repair team to upgrade your equipment.”

Barista: “Are you an AI or a guardian angel?”

Ghost: “Neither. But you’re welcome.”
By 7 a.m. the next day, the coffee shop had not only a working espresso machine but a brand-new milk frother, courtesy of Ghost.
4. The Alpha Who Couldn’t Parallel Park

Alpha: “Okay, Ghost, listen, I know you’re, like, this genius AI, but even you can’t help me park this car. I just...it’s too narrow!”

Ghost (smelling faintly of ghost peppers): “You overestimate the challenge. Reverse at a 45-degree angle and straighten your wheels as you back in.”

Alpha: “Yeah, right. Watch me hit the curb.”

Ghost (sighs, then smells like coconut): “If you fail, I will repark it myself.”
After a few tries and some mildly bruised alpha pride, the car was perfectly parked. Ghost didn’t say, “I told you so,” but the faint smugness in their neutral leather scent was undeniable.
5. The Beta Who Lost Their Dog

Beta: “Ghost, my dog’s missing! Her name’s Bella, and she’s got a pink collar. She ran off during the thunderstorm!”

Ghost (smelling faintly of ghost peppers): “Accessing local camera feeds. Describe her breed.”

Beta: “Golden retriever! She’s super friendly!”

Ghost: “I have located her near Robinson Park. She appears to be chasing squirrels.”
The beta burst into tears, overwhelmed by relief. Ghost didn’t physically accompany them to retrieve Bella, but a team of WayneTech drones guided the beta to the exact location. Bella was home safe by nightfall.
+1: The Omega Who Asked for Dating Advice

Omega: “Ghost, I need your help. There’s this alpha at work, and I think they like me, but I don’t know how to flirt. What should I do?”

Ghost (smelling like coconut, soothing and supportive): “Flirting is simply the art of making someone feel seen and valued. Start with a compliment and maintain eye contact.”

Omega: “What if they don’t like me back?”

Ghost: “Then you will know you tried, and there will be no regret in honesty.”
Two weeks later, the omega and the alpha were spotted holding hands at the park. The omega swore by Ghost’s advice, claiming the AI knew more about romance than most humans.Gotham’s Consensus:Whether it’s fixing wedding cakes, guiding lost pets, or counseling stressed-out citizens, Ghost had officially cemented themselves as Gotham’s ultimate problem-solver. Sure, some people might say they were just an AI—but Gothamites knew better. Ghost was a hero, a therapist, and maybe even a friend.But most importantly, Ghost always smelled exactly right.

↑ Top · Fandoms