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They were roommates.
Okay, not just roommates. They were a whole lot more than roommates. Roommates who also happened make each other breakfast every morning, fought like an old, murderous married couple, shared the futon in Althea’s apartment with Wade always (okay, almost always) being the little spoon, blew each other's backs out—
So maybe they were dating. Big whoop. Neither of them had stated
aloud
that they were, in fact, dating, but there was no need. What was the point of asking “what are we?” when their actions made what they were so obvious? Besides, everyone that mattered knew anyway. He tried not to overthink the homoerotic and sickeningly intimate bond that cropped up after all these months.
It had taken Wade and himself an embarrassingly long time to finally cut through all the sexual tension. A kidnapping (which Wade calls a, “forceful relocation, you really should thank me,”), a jaunt through the void (which was totally Wade’s fault), almost dying (and the fucker would have died if Logan didn’t force his way into the chamber), two months of living in a one bedroom apartment (with a coke addict who spent her time telling them to just get it over with and fuck already), and a severed limb (not Logan’s) was what it took for the two to finally bone. Everything else just clicked into place after that.
Their life settled into a shockingly domestic routine since destroying the Time Ripper and getting the fuck face who started the whole mess arrested. It was a totally foreign way of life to Logan, but it wasn’t so bad. Wade had started picking up mercenary jobs again to cover rent while he looked for a new job (the car dealership wouldn’t let him come back after he and Logan smashed the Kia), and Logan managed to land a job at a shop a couple streets down after weeks of near-constant job searching. They spent most of their evenings together with Blind Al, arguing over takeout or Wade’s surprisingly decent cooking, and had weekly game nights with Wade’s friends. It was all mundane and boring as all hell, but Logan was the happiest he’d ever been.
And while he never said anything, Logan had a feeling that Wade was just as happy as Logan was.
. . .
They had been lying there for quite some time, skin to skin, back to chest. The afterglow from what Wade let Logan do to him had long since faded, but he still relished in the feeling of having Wade Wilson in his arms.
Logan traced the contour of Wade’s chest and stomach while he ran his mouth about a mission he did the day before.
“—and Wolvie, this guy wanted me
sooo
fucking bad. He was all but on his hands and knees with his ass in the air—“
“Oh really?” Logan snorted. “He wanted you that bad?”
Wade sounded incredulous, “Yes he absolutely did! And I let him think it too, he followed me out to the back alley like a lost puppy. He looked like one of those cartoon characters who floats after the smell of a pie in a window.”
“Huh,” said Logan, who started tracing Wade’s bicep with a finger. “Then what?”
“Well, I had a fucking job to do moron, so obviously I pulled out my
beautiful
gold plated Desert Eagles and—“
Logan let Wade finish his story with minimal interruption, only calling him a
“fucking moron”
once more, and their conversation came to a slow-crawling stop as exhaustion settled in. Logan was still tracing idle patterns across Wade’s body, exploring the rise and dips of his skin. He could feel Wade’s steady breathing against him, and the rhythm was slowly lulling Logan to sleep too.
“Why do you do that?” Wade whispered, rousing Logan from his half-consciousness.
“Do what?” Logan whispered back.
“The…” Wade trailed off, his voice uncharacteristically soft. “The way you trace my skin when we’re together like this. Why do you do that?”
“Oh. Uh,” Logan didn’t have an answer. Well, he did, but he wasn’t one to open up about mushy gushy emotional crap. He scrambled for an answer that would explain exactly why he spent hours outlining Wade’s shape that didn’t make him out to be a sensitive lovesick fool.
Sure, Logan had never felt this way about anyone before, and yeah, he was pretty sure he wanted to spend the rest of his immortal existence worshiping the man next to him, but there was no need to say that.
He finally settled on, “I just like to, I guess.”
Brilliant. Absolutely fucking brilliant.
Wade chuckled sleepily, “Yeah, yeah. That’s why I love you…”
Logan’s hand, which was still wandering, stopped.
What did he just say?
Logan’s body went completely rigid and his mind completely blank. His mouth was probably flopping open like a fucking fish because the blabbering idiot in his arms said
what?
Wade’s breathing resumed its natural pattern, indicating that he had drifted off to sleep again. Instead of the rhythm being soothing, like it was just two minutes ago, it made Logan want to shake the fucker awake and demand what the hell he was getting at when he said
I love you.
At the same time, he wanted to walk out the door and get absolutely shit faced at the nearest bar so he wouldn’t have to think about it.
Logan did neither of those things. Instead, he lay awake staring at the ceiling, wondering what the hell he was going to do about the man that apparently loved him.
. . .
Logan woke up to the sound of something sizzling in the kitchen. He slowly opened his eyes, groaning when the late morning sunlight just about blinded him.
“
Gooooood morning sunshine!”
When his eyes finally adjusted to the brightness, he could see Wade, now dressed in fuzzy Hello Kitty pajama pants (because
of course
he owned Hello Kitty pajamas), overseeing the stove with what smelled like bacon. He briefly wondered where Al was, but answered his own question when he heard the shower running from the other side of the apartment.
“Care for some bacon, my little honey badger? And might I add, you look fan-
fucking-
tastic sprawled out on the bed like that. With the lighting making you look like a fucking god and the
teeny
tiny blanket covering everything that isn’t fit for a PG-13 audience? Fucking delectable, if you ask me—“
“Shut up,” grumbled Logan, with more malice than usual.
“Ooo, someone’s feisty this morning. I’ll just fix you up a plate and maybe you won’t be so goddamn hangry,” Wade drawled, completely unbothered by Logan’s bluntness. Logan slowly sat up, holding the blanket to make sure it didn’t slide off his lap and give Wade further reason to catcall him.
Watching Wade at the stove, who was singing some song under his breath and moving his hips, Logan’s mind fixated on what he said last night.
What did that asshole mean?
A knot of resentment settled somewhere in his chest. Whether Logan was resenting Wade or himself, he was too emotionally constipated to care. How could Wade just drop the fucking bomb and act like
nothing fucking happened
? They never named what was between them, that was the whole point. It was supposed to be
easy,
never actually addressing any of the emotions they felt. And now Wade’s gone and fucked it all up, leaving Logan to try and figure out if Wade really meant what he said, or if it was just some stupid one-liner.
Or maybe he didn’t do anything, and you’re the one trying to screw it up,
a not so fucked up part of his brain offered.
“I’m gonna take the dog for a walk,” Logan grunted, and unceremoniously stood. He needed to get out of the apartment before he suffocated in his own thoughts.
“What? But breakfast is almost ready!” Wade said, turning to where Logan was tugging on a pair of jeans. “Just wait ten minutes and we can go together.”
Logan acted like he didn’t hear him, reaching for a flannel that was haphazardly discarded on the back of the recliner and buttoning the shirt, not caring if the buttons were done up right. “I’ll be back, don’t wait on me.”
“But—“
“I said,” Logan bit out, “I’m going for a fucking walk.”
Wade slammed down the spatula he was holding. “Okay what the hell, man? What’s your fucking problem?”
Logan reached for the leash that they kept by the door, which immediately attracted Mary Puppin’s attention. “Nothing,” he said curtly, clipping the leash to the dog’s collar.
“You’re acting like a hormonal teenager!” Wade sniped. “Can you get your head out of your ass and answer my very reasonable question?”
“You’re the one getting all worked up over a fucking walk!” Logan shot back.
“Cause you’re being an ass about it!”
“Whatever,” Logan opened the door, “I’m going.”
The door slammed shut right in front of Logan’s nose, and he whirled around to face Wade, absolutely fuming.
“The fuck was that for!” he shouted.
“Can you answer my goddamn questions instead of being such a humongous dick about it?” Wade fired back. “I didn’t do shit to you and now you’re acting like I shoved a stick up your ass!”
“Get out of my fucking way and we’ll talk about it later!” Logan yelled, wrenching the door open again and nearly ripping it off its hinges.
“Oho!” Wade gaffed, “Since when did you want to fucking
talk?”
“Maybe you should learn how to shut your fucking mouth every once in a while, Bub,” Logan seethed.
Wade glared right back, “And you should learn how to communicate like a fucking adult sometime.”
“Oh, you have no right to tell me how to act like an adult you goddamn prick—“
“Then stop avoiding my question and fucking answer me!” Wade snapped.
“You want me to answer the question then?” Logan stepped right into Wade’s space, breathing hard. “
What the fuck did you mean last night?”
Wade cocked his head to the side and asked, “What?”
Logan slammed the door shut. “YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME, SO WHAT DID YOU FUCKING MEAN, HUH?“
Wade, for once, was completely speechless. He stared at Logan with his mouth drooping and his eyes blown wide as if he were caught in headlights. Logan thought it was some sort of fucking joke that this was what it took for the Merc to finally shut his mouth.
Logan plowed on, with Wade’s silence leaving space for him to spill everything he would have never said otherwise.
“So what, are we really together? Or are we just fuck buddies with a few extra perks? Did you say that because you really meant it, or just because I'm the only one who wanted you after Vanessa finally left your sorry ass? Is a good fuck all it takes to get you to tick?”
“We’ve danced around our fucked up…
thing…
here for months.
Months.
And not a fucking word. Not one. I’ve spent hours wondering about what we really were, questioning everything about my fucking existence here, and right when I think we’ve finally settled, right when I finally think we’ve got what we want, you just go and blow it all out of the water again!”
Logan’s chest heaved, drained by his own brutal honesty. Where Logan’s anger once was, shame prickled into place. The urge to walk out the door was stronger than ever, and it took every fiber of his being not to run away.
“You really just assumed all of that about me?” Wade asked. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”
“What’s wrong with
me?”
Logan reeled, caught off guard from Wade’s sudden blame shift.
“Yes, you! You fucking asshole, how could you think I was only using you for really,
really,
good sex?”
“I—“
“Because news flash, buddy, I don’t make breakfast for people who are just my ‘fuck buddies’. I don’t spend
hours
of my time digging through Goodwill bins, looking for something nice for them to wear because all they have is a yellow super suit! I don’t spend my evenings discussing how to pay the bills or what groceries we need to get or just having a
nice
conversation with people who are just my
FUCK BUDDIES!”
Wade exhaled, tearing his eyes away from Logan like he had something to hide.
“And… I wouldn’t have even let you close enough to get to know my friends. To let you even meet Vanessa, if you weren’t just as important to me, if not more,” Wade murmured.
Logan’s
oh
fell out of his mouth like a rock.
He was such an idiot.
“You– you really mean all of that?” Logan asked, the words softer than anything that had ever come out of his mouth before.
“
Yes,”
Wade exclaimed, exasperated. “Of course I do! And also, who the hell even uses the term ‘fuck buddies’? What the hell is that?”
Despite the tension of it all, Logan huffed a laugh. Of course the idiot couldn’t resist making a jab at Logan, even now. The joke eased the agitation between the two, making the light from Wade’s attention no longer piercing, but warming.
“I… I guess I could say the same about you,” Logan mumbled. “That you’re… important to me.”
God, he had never sounded so pathetic in his life
.
The smile that grew on Wade’s face, however, made his vulnerability worth it.
“Yeah?” Wade asked.
“Yeah,” Logan said, with enough bluntness to leave no room for questions.
The pair stared at each other, letting the words of the other settle into place. Letting their feelings reestablish themselves after the useless hellride they’d been put through. Sure, there was still plenty to address about their, ah, relationship, but Logan couldn’t care in the slightest. He was important to Wade, and Wade was important to him, more so than anyone else. That was all that mattered.
“So…” Wade’s voice lifted, once again laced with the cockiness that made Wade
Wade.
“Does that mean that you’ll stay for breakfast?”
Logan rolled his eyes, reaching back down to slip off his shoes and unclip the leash from a disappointed pup. “If that’s what it takes to get you to shut up.”
“Awe, so you are staying! I guess I really am that important to you!”
Logan shook his head as Wade danced back into the kitchen to prepare their plates, already talking Logan’s ear off about getting Mary Puppins a new knit sweater. He paused to watch Wade’s exuberance before following, responding with his usual gruffness as he helped Wade set the table for their small, far from perfect, and only a little coked up family.