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You had first met Anya in your second year medical school. She was a bright, shining brilliant light in the bleak world of academia. The only saving grace among the abundance of sleepiness nights, mind-numbing textbooks, the droning of self-assured professors, and most importantly, heaps and heaps of ramen.You remember the exact moment you met like it was yesterday. Anya was a classmate in your epidemiology class. You were running late on the first day. Not the best look for a new semester, but then again it was the *second* semester, and winter break had been much, much too short. You had overslept your damn alarm, unable to fit breakfast since paychecks from your seasonal job were all but dried up. You had nothing quick on hand to eat, knowing gas was decidedly more important than buying granola bars. It was hard not to miss the comforting taste of oaks, peanut butter, and chocolate all rolled up into one delicious “meal.”Having finally arrived at class practically spirit the entire way, you were exhausted, sweaty, and starving. A full 20 minutes late. Clearly, running wasn’t your strongest suit. The door to the classroom stood in front of you, foreboding, “abandon hope ye hope who enters here.” Okay, that was a little dramatic, but you knew everyone was going to silently judge and whip their heads around to stare at you the second you entered. It was a small class, not even 20 people, filled with nurses and aspiring doctors alike.Your university was a small one, a failing one at that. A quiet, sleepy town in the middle of butt fuck nowhere surrounded by mountains certainly didn’t have students from around the area clamoring to apply. There were rumors of a shut down of the graduate-level programs due to a lack of funding.The higher ups, scrambling to save the sad little school, decided the best solution was to merge and join the nursing and medical school classes shared together. It was a bandage to an overarching irreversible problem, but it was nice to see unfamiliar faces and make new connections with the fellow nursing students. You tried not to think of the impact the potential dissolution of the school would have on your future medical career.You stood outside of the door for what felt like hours, hands shaking slightly and clammy. Now it was time to stop acting like a pussy and to get onto it. You place your hand on the door handle. Nothing happened. Easier said than done. How about on the count of three. One… two…The door swung open. Startled, you shot backwards, taking two steps back. You tripped on your worn albeit favorite pair of tennis shoes. You might have been able to steady yourself, but a backpack so heavy it might as well be lead propelled your momentum backwards. Guaranteeing an embarrassing fall onto the ground. You hoped it wouldn’t hurt too much. If the backpack weighs so damn much, it should at the very least cushion your fall. You closed your eyes, bracing for impact.Except, that anticipated display of humiliation never happened. Instead, two hands shot out, catching your shoulders. A steady grasp prevented you from toppling over, extending a lifeline and bringing your center of gravity back to its midpoint.“Are you okay?” A female voice asked. Although the speaker sounded startled, their mellow cadence immediately calmed you. Their voice… It was like nothing you had ever heard before. The only way you could describe it was a long lost comfort you had lost ages ago, but were only just reunited with in the most unlikely of circumstances. You want nothing more to be enveloped by, transported into a world where only you and the owner of the voice existed. If only you knew what she looked like, darkness with weird spots of indistinguishable lights the only thing you could make out.Right. Your eyes were still screwed shut. You opened them, blinking away the sudden brightness. Before you was a woman of relatively medium stature. Her hair was shoulder length and straight, an ebony black that glowed brilliantly in the blinkering fluorescent lightning (they really should have replaced that bulb ages ago). You were pretty sure it was a complication of the sleep deprivation, but in the briefest of moments you were sure you saw an abundance of the bright and twinkling stars encased in her glossy locks.Her eyes were downcast, warm. Yet you couldn’t help but feel they were hiding a deep embedded melancholy that startled you. At that moment, you wanted nothing else in the world more to take it all away forever.Quite frankly, she was the most beautiful woman you have ever met. You were immediately stricken, heart pitter-pattering in a thousand of simultaneously erratic movements that you were certain a heart attack must feel like if weren’t for the warmth pooling in your belly.“Are you okay?” She repeated the words more slowly this time, gently shaking you a bit. You blinked rapidly.“Oh yes!” You shot back, sheepishly rubbing the back of your head. You immediately mourned the loss of contact, wished you had had more foresight to at least remain in her grasp a couple of seconds later. “Sorry, uh yeah I’m perfectly fine.” You were perfectly fine now with her by your side, at least.She arched an eyebrow, her hands slowly returning to her side. She remained close, like she was expecting you to fall over at any moment. God, she must have thought you were a klutz. So much for a good first impression. Your checks flushed with embarrassment.“Are you sure? You have been standing at the door for over five minutes.” She did not sound convinced.Five minutes? Your eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets. The woman (of your dreams) looked even more concerned by your expression, as if her fears were confirmed. You couldn’t have her thinking that you were some sort of nutcase!Surely that wasn’t the case, you couldn’t have been standing outside the door for more than a minute. Then again you had the clothing shift the night before. Right after working another shift at your second job. You had hardly managed to get any sleep the night before.Maybe, two, three hours tops. Time always seemed to slip more loosely whenever you were especially sleep deprived, your body losing its grasp on any semblance of time awareness. Turning it into an intangible concept that you were unable to see or behold. Sometimes, the best that would happen was that you would lmk lose track of hours at most, a hazy ghost of a string of memories you could hardly recall replacing it altogether. Other times, the entire day had gone by, nothing more than a haze of static were a string of memories should have been. /p>
While you were having a full-blown panic attack on the inside, you did your best at schooled your facial features into a more neutral expression. You were leaning nonchalantly (who were you kidding, it was awkward as hell) on the brick wall. Your backpack slid, causing you to lose your balance and wobble a bit. Her hands shot back out, but you righted yourself just in time. You shook your head, refusing her help.To prevent another mishap, yoh straightened your back as much as you could, forgoing the wall completely. She still eyed you wearily, but it did the trick because she lowered her hand.“Oh, yeah… I was like trying to figure out if this was the right room. I have never been on this side of the building before. This is the epidemiology classroom, right?” You took a double take at the room number, trying to play it cool.“Yes,” She nodded. “Class started around fifthteen minutes ago.” She took a glance at the classroom. You followed her eyes. A thousand eyes were staring back at you. Even the professor had stopped the whole syllabus spiel, a large rod that pointed towards the still projected image on the whiteboard.Without warning, she leaned towards your ear, whispering conspiracy. She was so close that you could feel her warm breath against your ear. It tickled. You almost squirmed from the intimacy of it all. “My name’s Anya, by the way. There’s an open seat next to mine, if you would like to sit next to me…” Her eyes drifted towards a corner of the class with a light black jacket draped over it, notebook, a stack of Post-its, and pen neatly upon the desk. The other seat was vacant.“Yes,” you whispered back instantly, no hesitation. You smiled. It was the first time in a long time you had smiled genuinely, that brightly. Anya returned it. She had the cutest little gap between her two front teeth. You briefly wondered what it would feel like to run your teeth against it…You don’t know why, but you offered her your hand. You weren’t usually this bold, so you too were shocked by. She stared at it, bewildered. You shared the same look. You had both been staring at it like an alien that popped out of the ground for a good couple of seconds before you realized your mistake, sucking a quick breath.You tried discreetly slipping it away. Before it reached your pocket, Anya grasped it. Not tightly or roughly, but in a tender, reverent sort took of way. This time, you made sure to memorize the softness of her palm against your own, every wrinkle and crevice. To savor the skin and skin contact she graciously bestowed you. You walked into class, together. What would soon turn into the first of many times.The rest of that particular class was a blur. An insignificant blimp stored in your brain that you had long ago had forgotten. What you did recall was the smell of her floral perfume, an fluttering in your chest when the professor announced that the seats chosen that class would be permanent for the rest of the semester, and the question, emboldened by the calmness you felt right next to her side allowed you to blurt out:
“Would you like to be my study partner?”