Work Text
Out of the frying pan and into cold, dead ashes went the Ultimate Assassin of the Ultimate Academy for Gifted Juveniles. Blood for blood was no legal tender (especially when said blood for blood was at the hands of a so called “Holy Salvation Society“ that went defunct after evidence of their operations were exposed), and with Japan’s declining birth rate, daylighting as a childcare professional was hardly the unshakable line of work it once was. It wasn’t completely demolished but most folks weren’t looking for professional babysitters when they had relatives. The times were changing and something had to change with it. Maki Harukawa was in desperate need of a career change, something more stable that ensured a decent income, something that would take in people without many strong credentials, something that would serve as a decent part time shift while she was still in high school…meaning the only available option left for the poor former contract killer was McDonald’s. The application process went as smooth as it could have been considering her rocky history and while Maki was very much aware of how suspicious she seemed to the manager and the other employees based on her pretty cold vibes, she managed to get a good amount of hours in each week that would help get the Butterfly Orphanage she called home some extra cash. Even got herself a proper uniform…with a skirt instead of pants for…some reason. No problem, Maki’s suffered through worse. All she needed now was to receive her proper employee training and catch the induction video she needed to watch to learn the rules…
The video itself…was kind of a blur, honestly. Sure, it was mostly standard employee training fare with a manager that was clearly putting on a mask to stifle the clear melancholy she could feel in their soul and employees that seemed too tired to really care about speaking up against appearing in this monotony but something else was making Maki have some…strange thoughts. Which struck Maki particularly hard as her training meant she typically had a very closed off mind but something about this video was making her rethink a lot of things…assassination? Holy Salvation Society? Killing her friends? Nonsense! Model employees would never do anything like that! Especially not such a…kind, caring, parental young girl like Maki, cold as she can be at times. No, Maki was never one for unjust violence such as this. She belongs in a quieter life, surrounded by smiling youth and decent food…
She has all the training she needs now but strangely enough, Maki couldn’t remember much of the video’s contents. Almost like a dream…but that can’t be right, right? Who dreams of working fast food? Most people have more unique dreams like…being an assassin or something. Wouldn’t that be funny, Maki thought to herself as the alarm woke her up from her usual slumber. But that’s only something you see in visual novels or drama tv shows. No, Maki’s never been all that special…maybe one day she could be scouted by a certain academy of ultimates but for now? She’s gotta get off the poor custom made mattress she has to sleep on and get ready for work. It’s a Saturday after all, early shift.
A quick shower and freshening up later, Maki put on her work uniform and left the orphanage…after making sure to get the other kids at the Butterfly ready for their days too. It may be a thankless job but somebody has to look over these little ones…but she can wait until after work to care for them. Right now, she had to catch the train, which was absolutely not an easy task considering how long it took her to actually enter…and the fact that she took up two or three seats by herself. Just gotta put on a stoic face and deal with the staring, Maki…you get enough of it on your shifts anyways.
Once she finally arrived at the location she worked at, Maki found herself standing behind a counter that didn’t hide a damn thing below the belt, dealing with the standard array of customers this place tended to get. “Sir, that’s not- Excuse me sir, you can’t-” a cloud of fluttering brown napkins and saucy splashes flew up into the air before settling to the floor, cast by a very irate older man throwing a fit. The store was unfortunately understaffed, the lunch rush had long since finished, and yet Maki was both more tired now than she was during the lunch rush and the only personnel there to clean up yet another “accidental” mess.
The girl’s trained body had faltered in her new career of bussing burgers for the Golden Arches. A once graceful lily of the valley poised for all deadly pursuits thrown her way, built for swiftness and silence once upon a possible time, now a dull tulip was all that remained after a year spent taking advantage of the huge employee discounts on lunches and snacks. Saving money killed her waistline as the final assassination she’d ever complete…if she ever did those, of course. After all, Maki was just a normal girl that took care of kids, right? Thunderous steps permeated the mostly empty restaurant with the full weight of her voluminous body slamming against the tiled floor, Maki purposefully putting more force into her walking than necessary. It was the only form of personal vengeance against the company she had, even if it did clap her cheeks together even louder, which helped herald her arrival whenever she had to deal with kids at both work and Brave Heart Hall High School…actually, that part of work isn’t too bad. Maki’s always been pretty good with them and while they can be a bit much at times, trying to play piggyback on her to the point of having to find one girl’s parents while she was sat on top of her shelf like a horse, baiting her into getting stuck trying to chase them into the playplace tunnels, or making her dive into the ballpit and cause a tidal wave with her weight displacing several scores of plastic balls, she could never hold a grudge against them like she did against the grown men and women that made her days worse.
The only worker forced to enter from the front’s double doors, the girl neared half her height in width to an almost ridiculous yet miraculous degree, carrying a slender upper half untouched by her stress induced gluttony in quite stark contrast to how she was built below the waistline, especially to anybody that would have known Maki prior to her employ. Hell below her and stars above, those milky white globes wobbled even among inaction like the softserve she’d occasionally slurp straight out the tap on the slower nights. And none of it helped with customers or life, considering how all her skirts were too short for her resulting in spending all her class days with her panties out as well as earning the ire of many a rude older female customer who seemed to think they had high authority over reality and how an oversized rump should fall in line with it.
Almost an entire lifetime passed before Maki finally got done scooching her enormous McWagon to this singular point of interest...a pile of condiment splashes and napkins left behind. Carefully bending forward with a crummy mop in tow, Maki began cleaning up this wretched customer-induced mess, the weight of that back rack still threatening to topple her over even on the defence . Maki just couldn’t win, could she? If she were…I dunno, an assassin, she could potentially use it for smotherings or cover but that’s ridiculous to even imagine. There’s nothing dangerous about Maki Harukawa, she’s just a regular girl…
The lecherous gaze of a nearby customer wasn’t lost, however on Maki’s attention during her meticulous cleanup, the eyes of a younger man who was originally going to ask about the drink menu practically boring a hole into the black and red lacy pair of panties Maki had made the choice or “mistake” of wearing today…prompting the valuable employee to respond to his stares in kind.
“Yeah yeah, take it all in, pal. You're lucky I'm about to reach restaurant manager here, or else you'd be saucing those McNuggets with your blood!”
He’d be back tomorrow. They always do…
And that’s that! What do you think?
Well, it’s definitely interesting and we’d probably make a lot of money from the special features alone…but why exactly do…this to promote the sales of Season 53?
Simple! Sex sells but we can’t just use plain old fanservice, we already have enough of that in the show. No, what would really help us sell is catering to…let’s call them “alternative demographics”. Niche fetishes will help get us more popularity by drawing attention towards subcommunities which give us more money and revenue as thanks for giving them what they want! Simple as that, plainly speaking.
Rather unconventional but surprisingly, I can see the reasoning behind it. Could probably make a killing packaging stuff like this with limited edition Blu-Rays. Just don’t make this too much of a habit, Miss Shirogane. Your little tweaks to Season 53 already got us in some hot water for “obvious writer fetishes”.
Ah…hmph. Alright, I’ll tone it down. But can you tell the producers to at least greenlight a couple more?
I’ll see what I can do.