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Penelope is having the day from hell. This morning she woke up with the worst period cramps she'd ever had, then her editor had pulled apart her entire pitch for an article and she'd had to restart it and now her best friend is dragging her to a family dinner that she doesn't have the energy to face. Sure the Bridgerton's are her family as much as they are Els, but the last thing she needs is all the Bridgerton's in one room. Still El won't relent and she can't face a an argument so she wears the comfiest thing she can find and sucks it up. May as well just get it over with and then leave as early as she can. Colin greets them when they pull up at the Bridgerton's swanky Mayfair home or number 5 as they like to call it. "Penelope?" His face is full of concern. "You look awful." He says. "Are you okay?"Eloise rolls her eyes. "Wow Colin." She reprimands. "You really know how to make someone feel good."Penelope winces, and Colin rushes forward. "Pen?" He searches her face. She winces again."It's fine just bad cramps." She says. Colin, who has been her friend for years and knows her extremely well, looks unconvinced but leads them inside anyway.As usual she is passed from person to person swept up in endless hugs and greetings and forced to stand for ages. Normally she doesn't mind, but she desperately needs to sit down. She's suddenly delighted that this a kid free night. She doesn't have the energy to spend time with all the little ones, even though she normally loves being their Aunt Penelope. The pressure is building in her belly and she is beginning to wonder if something isn't desperately wrong.Colin senses her discomfort, and leads her into the living room. Daphne and Simon join them and Daphne tries to start a conversation, only Penelope can't focus. She can't focus one bit. "Penelope?" Daphne asks. "Are you okay?""Cramps." Penelope states, as the rest of the family file in."Oh dear, let me go get you a heat pad." Daphne scrambles to her feet, looking sympathetic. Simon chucks her a cushion and she lays her head down.She must fall asleep, because next thing she knows is on the sofa alone, a blanket tucked over her. Then before she knows it, she's screaming in sheer agony. Her entire body feels like it's on fire.The entire Bridgerton family come rushing in Anthony holding a candle stick, Benedict holding a butter knife. "Where's the intruder?" Anthony shouts.Hyacinth scoffs. "What are you gonna do?" She asks. "Set them on fire with an unlit candle stick or perhaps butter them?" She says smugly, not missing the chance to best her brothers. Both men awkwardly drop their unique weapon choices. "Oh God." Penelope groans as she feels her crotch get wet. She's just wet herself in front of the entire Bridgerton family. Yes the legal Bridgerton women and sometimes Colin and Benedict had seen her in some bad situations, but this is possibly the worst. "Fuck." She groans through the agony. "Have I wet myself?" She asks. "I didn't even need to pee." Kate frowns. "Penelope." She states. "Have the cramps been hitting you every few minutes?" Penelope nods. "Can you describe them?" She asks. So Penelope, to her mortification, describes the cramps in detail while the entire family listen on."Fuck." Everyone looks at Violet in complete shock as she swears loudly. "Oh God," Violet says again. "Kate tell me you don't think..." She doesn't finish her sentence.Kate grimaces. "I'm afraid I do."Penelope tries her best not to scream as another cramp hits her, but instead she hisses. "Will someone fucking tell me what the fuck is happening?" She cries out through the intense pain.Kate sighs. "Well here's a sentence I never thought I'd have to say. I think your in labor Penelope."Penelope laughs. "That's hilarious, but in case you haven't spotted it. I'm not actually pregnant." She states."Yeah and I think she'd know if she was pregnant. Honestly, Kate you've read far too many magazine horror stories." Eloise adds, looking around the room. To her horror no-one else looks quite so indignant. In fact they all just look shocked. Completely shocked. As if Kate is somehow actually making sense.Penelope picks up on their belief Kate is right too. "I can't be pregnant." She states. "Because then I'd be a truly terrible mother." she adds, a lump in her throat. "I'd be a mother who didn't know she was having a baby."No one says anything for a moment. Then Anthony of all people speaks up. "Penelope, you wouldn't be a bad mother. Your body is supposed to tell you if you are carrying a child and its not your fault you didn't know. This can happen and it is never your fault, and no matter what you have the Bridgerton army behind you. Just to be practical I do think we need an ambulance," Daphne steps out of the room. "and can you let John check you over?" He adds gently. "And then when you've had that done, I think we'll have to call the father." He adds. "But if you tell me who then I can do that. It's going to be a hell of a shock and I promise I'll be nice, but firm that you need them." Penelope pales. "There's no need." She states.Anthony frowns. "Or I guess Benedict could call them or Mum or Kate or..." "Anthony." Penelope cuts him off. "I haven't slept with anyone since France." She says as John steps forward to examine her. John begins to feel her stomach as Colin goes white. Sheet white. Then he rushes over to the bin in the corner of the room and begins to vomit."Oh God." Violet puts the pieces together.Eloise rolls her eyes. "Colin that's disgusting." She says as her brother retches. Francesca puts her hand on his back, and helps stabilise him.Penelope bats John away. "Col?" She asks."I'd definitely say you're in labor." John concludes. "Obviously I'd need to examine your vagina but..."Penelope cuts him off. "Colin?" She asks, her face mask of concern.Benedict smirks, never one to miss out on mocking his siblings. "I think Daddy over there is feeling a little queasy.""Don't call him Daddy that's disgusting." Eloise retorts with an eye roll completely missing the point."Oh shall I call him father instead?" Benedict responds."Ben!" Sophie snaps, but it's too late the penny has dropped and Eloise's eyes go rounder then any of them have ever seen. Her jaw drops and she freezes, then she lunges. Fortunately for Colin, Kate steps forward in an attempt to restrain Eloise. It works in that she doesn't manage to punch Colin, but she does manage to punch Kate straight in the nose."Kate." Anthony screeches, Kate rolls her eyes as blood pours from her nose, clearly unimpressed by her husband's dramatics.Benedict restrains Eloise. "Let me go." She screams. "He knocked up my best friend."Francesca sighs. "Hyacinth are you filming this?"Hyacinth just sighs. "You'll ruin my footage."Penelope hisses. Colin rushes back to her. "Pen." He asks, grabbing her hand.Penelope groans. "I can feel..." She cuts herself off. "I can...""John." Screams Colin, even though the poor man is right behind him."Erm I'm going to have to take her bottoms off." He says.Violet sighs. "Everyone out. Except John and Colin." She adds, she shouldn't have to say it, but she knows her children. Hyacinth is still filming. She'll be having words later. Francesca is the only one comforting Colin in anyway, as Benedict is seemingly finding the whole thing hilarious and Eloise, Daphne and Anthony look ready to beat him up and Gregory is so engrossed in his phone she's not even sure he's noticed he's about to become an Uncle. Kate's nose is wonky as Sophie and Simon fuss over her. Violet is not stupid. She knows her children have sex, but this is a shock. It's a bigger shock for Colin and Penelope though and unlike her kids she isn't annoyed at her son. After all how can he have failed Penelope if neither of them knew she was pregnant? He's beside her now and that's what matters. As she ushers them all out, she sighs, they've had some horribly dramatic dinners (the one where Gregory had chopped the tip of his thumb off while proving a point, the one where Benedict had been high and projectile vomited all over the food and several of his siblings and who could forget the one where a dance routine ended with several hospital trips), yes they had some dinners in their time but this one might just be the winner.---In the weirdest moment of her life Francesca's husband asks permission and then begins to feel around her vagina. Colin squeezes her hand as she shuffles at the discomfort. "You're fully dilated." He states looking as shocked as Penelope feels. "Is there anyone else you want with you when you start pushing?" He asks. "I'm not sure we can move you out the room now, but I'm gonna get a few things. Try not to push.""Erm Daphne, Eloise and Violet please." Penelope says as he resches the door. John nods and disappears and she turns to Colin. "We're having a baby." She says.Colin nods. "Yes Penelope we are."Then she groans. "Oh fuck Colin the carpets white women shit themselves in labor." She states. "I'm gonna shit myself and destroy the carpet and..." She moans as another contraction hits. "Ah fuck, you'll have to..." She doesn't finish the sentence as the pain rises. Colin reaches out and strokes her hair. "Pen, this may be your weirdest spiral yet, but it's a spiral. I know this is a massive shock and I'm so sorry." He states.She turns to him eyes wide. "Why are you sorry?" She asks. "I'm the idiot who didn't know I was fucking pregnant." She states."No." Colin starts as John returns with Penelope's requested family members in tow. Eloise glowers at Colin, but says nothing.Daphne lays down a sheet. "I'm sorry." She says with a chuckle.Penelope just grunts as a contraction hits and then grins. "Thank God I won't shit on you carpet." Colin mouths don't ask as confused glances are exchanged then Colin helps her onto the sheet and sits behind her. She moves so she is comfortable leaning against his chest. Daphne and Eloise each take a hand as John asks Violet to help him."Right Penelope." John states, examining her. "Push whenever you feel like it."---Their daughter is born screaming after twenty minutes of pushing. John and the paramedics who have eventually arrived, reckon Penelope has been in labor for a few days after she shared she's suffered what she assumed were cramps for a while. Colin cries behind her, and then cuts the chord while telling her how perfect she is. Eloise jokes that they'd better name the baby Eloise while Daphne and Violet gush over the new addition.They're taken to the hospital and Anthony has to block the door to stop the Bridgerton family following them all. They're kept in the hospital overnight as birth has been so unexpected and they get a warning from Anthony that the entire family intend to visit that afternoon.Penelope cradles their little girl, staring down at her. "She needs a name." She states as her daughter sleeps peacefully.Colin nods. "Amelia, Emma, Olivia, Freya..."Penelope cuts him off. "Too common. She needs something unique like Hyacinth."Colin fakes horror. "Let's not make Hy's head any bigger then it already is." He jokes."Well not Hyacinth exactly, but not something common either." She adds."Isabelle?" Colin suggests.Penelope shakes her head. "Prudence bagsied it."Colin shakes his head. "You can't bagsie a name." He states. "But fine India?""Nope India Featherington-Bridgerton sounds like a knob." Penelope says."Ouch." Laughs Colin."Una? Carey? Julia?" Colin lists. "Pheobe? Juliet? Imogen?" The baby kicks her legs at that."Imogen?" Penelope repeats and she kicks again. "Oh you like that do you?" She asks. "Imogen Eloise Featherington-Bridgerton." She states. "I think we have a name." She beams.At their request Eloise is the first official visitor through the door. "Meet Imogen Eloise." Penelope introduces.Eloise looks down at her niece. "If you think this means I'll forgive you Colin..." She says, but she is already too distracted by the baby to finish the sentence. Colin gives an over the top air punch. Penelope laughs.---After that the afternoon is a blur of Bridgerton visitors. Kate and Anthony argue over who gets the first hold (Kate with her broken nose wins) then Colin has to practically wrestle the baby from Anthony's arms when she needs a feed. Anthony argues that she's too adorable to let go.Then Benedict and Sophie come in. Sophie holds Imogen while Benedict makes endless condom jokes and then presents them with a carrier bag of contraception as Sophie nearly drops the baby in horror. Colin quickly swoops in and snatches his daughter back.Daphne and Simon bring their eldest four year old Augie to meet his new niece and he sits on the bed and holds her with help from his parents. "She's better then Belinda." He says over and over referring to his one year old sister. Colin finds it funny as does Simon, but Daphne looks infuriated. Still she snaps endless pictures of Augie and his cousin.Francesca just holds her newest niece as Colin and Penelope thank John for delivering her. In true John style he just grins and compliments them on a beautiful daughter.Gregory holds his niece and chats to her, while Hyacinth does a complete unrequested photo shoot and then accidentally breaks the Internet by posting Imogen's finger around hers on her stories. Mystery Bridgerton trends across social media and all sorts of theories begin online.That night as they get next to no sleep with a screaming Imogen, Colin reads the theories out to her. The top theory is that Violet Bridgerton had a secret child as Penelope finds hilarious as Imogen has an I name.The next morning Colin sighs. "We may have to publicly announce she's ours." He states. "Daphne got hounded dropping the kids off this morning and Kate has had a stream of abuse for hiding a pregnancy."Penelope sighs. "I just had to have had a Bridgerton baby." She jokes. And then she frowns. "Oh God." She says."Please don't tell me you're giving birth again." Jokes Colin.Penelope shakes her head. "Worse I'm afraid. We're going to have to break the news to my mum." She sighs.Colin laughs and even though they have a hell of a lot to figure out, Penelope just grins back. Just for now they're going to be okay.

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