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Tech woke up in their own bed, staring at the ceiling. The first thought in their head was about him. ‘He’ll probably talk about things far beyond what you can follow.’ They stood in the shower, staring down at the hot and cold knobs. ‘He’s too pretty, far out of my league.’ They helped ground him when he came through the Respawn Machine. ‘He’s preoccupied with his work.’ They sat in their chair, blankly staring at their monitor. ‘He’s scarily strong. You shouldn’t be with him anyway, he might hurt you.’ They made a sandwich and quickly returned to their workshop, ignoring their peers eating together. ‘He’s got far more experience than you.’ They walked through the halls in no real hurry. ‘You won’t be able to keep up.’ They did a routine diagnostic on the Machine. ‘He likes men. He’s not going to pay you any mind.’ They watched some of their peers walk past the door. ‘He’s far too old for me.’ They made popcorn on the stove. ‘He’ll think you’re too childish and he’s right to think so.’ They sat in front of the common room couch next to Scout, beneath Demo and Sniper. ‘Why can’t you like someone closer to your age?’ They opened his lab door and greeted him absentmindedly, going through the motions. ‘He’s your coworker, your doctor!’ Tech loaded boxes of god-knows-what onto a trolley. ‘You’re a bad person for thinking about him like this.’ They pushed the trolley down the maintenance hall. ‘How dare you.’ They stopped dead, bumping the boxes into the wall. ‘…Where are all these thoughts coming from?…’ Tech stumbled and set down the box they were carrying. ‘…I just want to be held.’ They leaned against a pristine, wooden counter, so lost in their own head. Where had the day gone? “Tech? Are you alright?” Medic called out from the storage room, then peeked into the main lab. “Was that box too heavy?…” “Huh?” Tech looked up from the counter, then at the box. The corner was dented from it leaving their hands too early. They hoped whatever was in the box wasn’t too fragile. “No, no… I’m just…” They looked up at him, meeting his gaze. “I’m okay, just a little stuck in my own head.” “I’ve noticed.” Medic seemed to understand. “You have been a little, mm… distant today.” They nodded and said nothing further. A moment passed and Medic still lingered in the doorway to the cold storage. “Would you like to talk about what’s bothering you?” He broke the silence before it went on for too long. “I’m not sure what exactly it is.” They didn’t completely lie, but they didn’t want to turn this into a confession. They feared if they spoke any longer, they’d become inconsolable. For the time being, they held themselves, keeping it together. Medic pressed his mouth into a fine line. “Mm. That’s alright…” Tech remained silent. “Why don’t you sit down and take a break?” He gently offered, walking over and picking up the box to inspect it for damage. Finding the dented corner, he sucked his teeth. “Tch, hm.” It wasn’t an issue, but it was another straw weighing heavily on Tech’s shoulders. They took a seat on a stool and sighed, leaning against the counter. Their throat felt tight. ‘Please don’t. Not here, not around him!’ They begged themself. They took a deep breath but their brow furrow shakily against their wishes. As Medic brought the barely damaged box into the storage room, Tech let out their breath. Their heart clawed into their throat. There were cracks in the dam, letting tiny drops of water through their hardened walls. ‘Please. At least wait until after you leave his lab…’ Their feelings spilled from their eyes, running down their face and dripping onto the counter. ‘He’ll think you’re such a child. Crying? Over a slightly dented box? Get over it, seriously. He’ll probably tell you to leave. Might as well get a head start so you don’t embarrass yourself further. You’re so-’ Tech’s thoughts were cut short when Medic came back into the room. Startled, they jolted but kept their head down in hopes of him not noticing. “Tech?” Dammit. He walked closer and they soon felt a gentle hand on their back. That’s it. It was over. Their sobs were uncontrollable and their thoughts raced through their mind. Their muscles vibrated with stress and their head felt like it was going to pop, the pressure of their cries was so much to bare. Medic set his other hand on Tech’s shoulder. He was unsure of the cause of this outburst, but still showed concern for his patient, coworker, and friend. “Oh…” He got down closer to their level, leaning over by their seat. Tech opened their eyes, unable to see clearly past their tears. They glanced at him, then back down to the wet counter. His hand soothingly glided back and forth across Tech’s back, waiting patiently for their crying to ease. “Deep breaths…” He calmly guided. Tech’s tears continued to flow, but they slowly gained control of their sobs and breathing. They took deep breaths, accepting the hiccups and gasps that interrupted them. “What is wrong?” He finally broached the dreaded question. Tech’s gaze found Medic’s blurry face, their lip quivering, fearful of speaking the honest answer. They shook their head. “I can’t help if I’m not aware of the problem.” He tilted his head. They slowly turned towards him, their hands reaching out hesitant, shy, unsure. He cautiously stood up and pulled them into a warm, placid embrace. His hand continued its calming motions. Tech’s posture was stiff and uncertain. Surely this was pity or perhaps guilt? No, he wasn’t the type to feel that sort of thing. It was pity. ‘Poor little thing,’ he must be thinking. ‘What a miserable creature. Such a pathetic outburst.’ Unaware of their thoughts, he continued his peaceful petting, hoping to dull their nerves. His expression tensed, fearing he was making the situation worse. “It’s alright…” He cooed. Tech sniffled, cautiously laying their head on his welcoming chest in pitiful defeat. ‘If he hates me for some reason after this,’ they thought. ‘I can at least enjoy this moment…’ All of these intrusive thoughts would seem ridiculous later, they knew this. It didn’t stop it from hurting right now. They were just too lost in the feeling. Eyes squeezed shut, they sobbed against his warm chest. Dripping tears soaked into his coat as he pet their head. His heartbeat pounded rhythmically against their ear. Pomb Pomb… Chik! Pomb Pomb… Chnk. Their curiosity pried past their overwhelming hopelessness. They listened closer to the mechanical sounds accenting his heartbeat, nuzzling softly into his chest. It was oddly calming. “Mm. That’s better, isn’t it?” His voice vibrated through his chest and into their ear. Their brow’s tension lessened as their intrusive thoughts began to dissipate. ‘He doesn’t hate me… does he?…’ They press their nose into his sternum, breathing him in. His embrace firms, holding them snugly to his chest. His cheek suddenly, softly rests on top of their head. ‘Would he even have a reason to?…’ ‘Is this a dream?’ They wonder to themself. Their hand touches his chest, feeling the texture of his coat under their fingertips. ‘No… But it has to be.’ A deep sigh left his lungs and his eyes closed. He seemed tired, they both did. He decided to give you a small break before prying one last time and dropping the subject. “May I put away the rest of the boxes into cold storage? Then we can talk about… this?” His tone was the gentlest they had ever heard from him. They thought for a dreaded moment, then nodded. He parted from them. “Okay.” Just like that, it was over. The loneliness came flooding back as he walked away. Desperate for just one more sorry embrace, their eyes followed him, threatening to overflow again until he returned. If he ever returned to their poor, lonely embrace, an eternity would have already passed. Just a few minutes later, he was back at their side with a calm approach. “Tech…” His tone… could they read it properly? It was soft, pitying… sympathetic, maybe? That couldn’t be right. “It’s just one of those days.” They spoke, trying to answer all of his questions in one go and as vaguely as possible. Leave no room for follow up questions. The cracks in their voice let on that there was more, however. Medic nodded, accepting the loose answer. “Do you need any kind of… help?” He couldn’t get any more vague, but he didn’t have much to work with. Their weak gaze met his piercing eyes, causing them to waver slightly. “N-No…” They lied badly. He sighed, not wanting to push too hard. “Alright.” He watched as they warily reached out to him, despite declining help. A thought crossed his mind. ‘Is this about their little fondness for me?…’ Furrowing his brow and closing his eyes briefly, he tried to tamp down his ego. Opening his eyes again, he looked over Tech’s hesitant hands as they reached for him. “What’s this?” He asked gently, placing his hand beneath theirs. “Please…” Their voice came out dry. “Hold me, again.” His hand guided their head to lay peacefully against his chest, soothing them with relaxing strokes. “Oh, Tech…” His voice lingered in their head, gentle and non-intrusive. “If this is all you needed…” His nose pressed to the top of their head, contemplating. “You’re allowed to ask.” He pressed a tender kiss to their hair. Tech’s face was buried deep in his safe hug, unaware of anything else in the world. Nothing settled in their mind but the sweet feeling of belonging, the warmth of his body, the comfort of his words. They were at home in his arms. They wished they could tell him how much this meant. They wanted to say how loving he felt. They didn’t dare speak about how they didn’t want to part as long as they lived. Maybe one day they would be ready to. ‘Melodramatic.’ ‘Emotional.’ ‘Out of touch.’ ‘Hopeless.’ ‘Sad.’ ‘Desperate.’ ‘Fragile.’ ‘Delicate.’ ‘Delusional.’ All of it was gone from their head. They left those thoughts on the counter in a puddle of their tears. They were starving for this touch. ‘One of those days’ was finally good for something.