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Your insides churned. Your head spun. Your heart pounded in your ears, eyes threatening to pool over with tears. And you wanted to tear your own skin off with the way your clothes consistently rubbed against it all wrong.You were going to throw up. Or pass out. Or both. Preferably both, you reckoned.Charlie had insisted on throwing a party at the hotel tonight to celebrate the human world holiday. Valentine’s Day, they called it, though you had stopped paying attention to it long before you had even arrived in Hell. It was still well and thriving down in the fiery depths, however, fake love and sex appeal amplified to eleven all week. It was driving you absolutely mad.But you could hide away from the populace and the advertisements til this all blew over, that wasn’t the hard part. What *was* sending you into a frenzy and had tipped you over the edge into insanity had been the invitation to this blasted party. Lucifer had been ecstatic to go, excitement coursing through him like a puppy once he learned that his daughter had once again invited him to something, and you didn’t have the heart to tell him you’d rather chew your own leg off than be surrounded by certified Love Day vomit.So here you were; hyperventilating in a fitting room in some shitty clothing store in the middle of Pentagram City instead of being locked away in a cozy cocoon of blankets, watching dumb comedy movies and halfway lost in a tub of ice cream like you had been doing for the past week.No one had told you to come here. No one had insisted that you needed to buy a new dress for tonight. No, you had decided that all on your own, *you* had thrown this misery onto yourself. But it was expected of you, wasn’t it? If you didn’t show up tonight on Lucifer’s arm in something revealing, flashy, and seductive, then you’d be the laughingstock of the whole hotel. Whether they said it to your face or not. It was Valentine’s Day, and that equaled sexiness. Or so the rest of the Pride Ring told you so.But for you? The whole idea made you want to reel in disgust. It was just so…*unlike* you. All this lace, and frills, and low cut necklines, and high slits, and too tight corsets, and barely there straps. Trying to find anything that fit comfortably was becoming an uphill battle.This was now the third store you had been to and currently you had on a black velvet dress; corseted at the waist and flowing down to your knees, a high slit sliced up to your hipbone and two pieces of fabric draped off the sides of the top of the corset to act as sleeves. You could barely breathe as it smushed your chest in all the wrong places. Tears pricked at your eyes as you nearly tore the wretched thing off of you, throwing it into a black heap on the ground. You aggressively wiped your eyes as you got dressed in your own clothes.When you exited the room you found a store attendant, politely handing her the dresses that you had taken with you. Swallowing your embarrassment you asked her, “Would you by chance have any other dresses besides these? Perhaps…um…in a bigger size as well?”She looked you up and down, her snake eyes burning holes into your skull. You wanted to disappear right then and there for even asking her. Either she didn’t recognize who you were, didn’t care, or felt particularly brave because Lucifer wasn’t currently with you. “I don’t think we’ll have anythin’ that’ll fit you, hon. We don’t sell dresses that flatter your…certain…body shape. Too form fittin’, if you ask me. You’ll wanna hide…all a’ that, try the shop down the street. They cater to your clientele.” She snatched the dresses out of your hand, avoiding contact with you as if the mere touch with you was gross to her, before she strutted away, her too-tall heels clicking condescendingly against the floor behind you.You bolted out of the door before anyone else in the store could see you.It took about another hour but you finally worked up the courage to finally walk into another clothing store. You couldn’t go back empty-handed, but you’d take *anything* at this point, just so you could go home.A tiny bell jingled above your head, a small frown etched into your face at the task laying in front of you. There was a wild assortment of dresses to choose from, in a wide array of colors. You sighed, already defeated and on the verge of giving up. You weren’t sure how many more humiliating dressing room incidents you could handle. So you grabbed the first basic dress you saw; a blood red simple-looking thing vaguely in your size.You sulked to the dressing room and went through the motions for the umpteenth time that day, pulling the satin fabric over your body. It wasn’t super unflattering per se, the babydoll shape sitting right at your waist and the bust fitting more or less comfortably. You could at least breathe without struggling this time. But there was still that infuriating slit, revealing your entire thigh, and the neckline sat way too low for your liking. But it was good enough. It would have to be. You were done. You just wanted to go home.-Lucifer was waiting for you when you arrived home, nearly toppling you over as he pounced on you as soon as you stepped foot inside. His arms wrapped around you tightly, his smile lighting up the room as he lifted you up and spun you around.“Ducky! You’ve been gone nearly all day! Where’ve you been?” He placed you back down on your feet but still held you in his arms.“I uh…went shopping. For tonight.” Your voice was flat, exhausted. Dreading putting that blasted dress back on in a mere few hours.He eyed the bag in your hand, a small smirk growing on his lips. Guilt seeped its way into your veins. You knew what he was expecting and what you had ended up choosing was not the same.“Oh? Bought something special, did you? A surprise, or do I get a sneak peek before everyone else?” He cocked an eyebrow, his look turning sultry. Your stomach twisted into a knot. Satan, you hated today.“Um…we’ll see, Luci. I…I need to go get ready.” (You needed to be alone.) Is what you wanted to tell him, but you didn’t want to douse his excitement. You weaseled out of his grasp, slinking down the hallways toward your shared bedroom as fast as you could.He followed you for a spell, rushing after you, his smirk replaced with a look of concern. “Wait, ducky, are…are you okay?” He reached out towards you, but you had reached your bedroom door before he could get a hold of you.“I’m *fine*, Luci. I just need a moment. Please.” You told him fleetingly, shutting the door in his face as soon as the words left your lips. He stood staring at the wooden surface, eyes wide, unsure of what to do.-You were going to explode.You grabbed at your hair, tears flowing down your face at what you had just done. You wanted to scream. Instead, you grabbed the nearest pillow off the bed and chucked it against the wall. A dull thud resounded against the plaster. You huffed angrily, half stomping into the bathroom and aggressively pulling out everything you would need to make yourself look at least half decent. (You owed him that much after how you had just treated him.)Makeup and hair tools and various jewelry littered the bathroom counter, but yet *nothing* was looking right. You were on your third makeup look attempt; a subtle red eye look with a sharp eyeliner, mascara, and matching dark, blood-red lipstick. You weren’t satisfied, but you were running out of time. Sighing, you finally slipped on that awful dress before searching the room for the highest pair of heels you owned. You’d probably break an ankle by the end of the night, but at least they would make Lucifer happy. That was all that really mattered tonight.Again he was waiting for you by the door when you opened it, though this time he seemed more nervous, waiting for you to come to him instead of rushing towards you like before. His eyes lit up at the sight of you, though you didn’t notice at first, with your head downcasted towards the floor.“You look absolutely breathtaking, ducky.” He whispered. You finally turned your gaze up to meet him, being met with a downright *impressive* sight when you did. He had changed into an outfit you had never seen before, all black leather, a skin-tight high V-cut crop top accompanied by extremely low-cut pants with heart netting cutouts near his thighs, topped off with a new black and red ringmaster coat around his shoulders. (He looked amazing compared to you.)You kept silent, too afraid that your words would betray you and release the waterfalls all over again. You couldn't risk ruining your makeup. Again. So you instead gave him a small smile, the best you could muster through your inner turmoil. He seemed to not notice was what hidden behind it.He walked forward, taking your arm in his, snapped his fingers, and led you through a glowing portal straight into Charlie’s hotel.The place was already buzzing with people, music, and lights.You regretted coming already.Though you were grateful Lucifer never let go of you as he went around saying hello to all of his daughter’s friends, staying well and clear away from the mop of red and black hair that peeked above the crowd. You were lost in your mind the entire time, seeing the colors and shapes move around you but not really hearing what was happening. You were holding on to Lucifer with a death grip, not letting him leave you for a second. You could feel a thousand eyes on you, everyone in the crowd staring at you, *the queen of Hell*, half exposed for a few dozen of people to see. On this day of all days, with sex on everyone's mind, you were nothing but eye candy to them. Something to ogle at. A piece of meat to be caught and savored.You wanted to disappear. You were suffocating from their views.“Hey,” You heard someone call out. A hand came to rest on your forearm and you instinctively flinched. Whoever it was pulled their hand away immediately when you did. “Sweetheart?”“She seems a bit tense. You’re sure she’s alright? Perhaps our queen isn’t much of a partygoer.” You heard someone else say with a mocking tone. Static threatening to tickle your ears with their words but you closed your eyes and blocked them out.“She’s *fine*.” A closer voice snapped back. “Come on, ducky.” They continued. And then you were being moved, led through the hotel’s hallways with someone’s arms firmly around you. You were brought to a door and once it was opened you were led outside onto a balcony, the city of Hell sleeping below you.The cold air hit your face like an icy slap, sending a shiver down your spine and forcing you to gulp in a deep breath. It felt like icicles in the back of your throat but it relieved some of the tension in your mind, the cold working its way through your system like a soothing syrup.You wrapped your arms around yourself to cover your exposed skin, continuously drinking in the frigid air in steady, deep breaths. Like…like you had taught Lucifer to do during his panicked episodes.“Ducky,” You heard him timidly call out your nickname next to you. He had let go of you as soon as you had stepped foot onto the balcony and now he seemed afraid to touch you, a horrid mixture of fear and worry stuck to his face, uncertainty controlling his limbs.You flicked your eyes back down to the city below, guilt once again gnawing at your insides. (You had ruined the night.) “I’m fi-”There was a gloved finger placed on your lips before you could finish your two-worded sentence. “Don’t, sweetheart. I know you’re not okay.” He removed his silencing finger, not caring about the lipstick that had smeared onto him, and went to lace his hands with yours. “Tell me what’s going on. Please. Let me help you.”You nearly burst into tears at his words. Your bottom lip trembled and your jaw ached from the building pressure. You swallowed the lump in your throat. “I…I…” But the pressure snapped, muddy blackness pooling at the corners of your eyes and dripping down your face. “I ruined everything.”A look of confusion flashed across his face as he instinctively went to wipe away your tears, doing his best not to smear the watery makeup all over your face. “What?”“I ruined everything, Luci!” You sobbed, your tears flowing in earnest now, too quickly for his fingers to keep up. He resorted to just cradling your face and listening to you as you continued. “Tonight was supposed to be special, *everybody* says it’s supposed to be *special*, but I don’t even know what that fucking means half the time! Why is it that romance is all about attractiveness and sex and being seductive on this *stupid ass* holiday? It makes me feel so…so gross!” You screwed your eyes shut and stomped your foot. It was childish, but it felt good to finally say how you felt out loud. “Never mind the fact that I don’t even have the body for it! Do you know how hard it is trying to find a dress that isn’t revealing down here? Let alone one that fits *me*?” You pulled at your skirt, knocking your knees together in an attempt to keep the slit closed, to no avail.Lucifer was still, silent, his brow furrowed as he absorbed your words. But after a moment he seemed to make up his mind, being broken out of his frozen state. He let go of your hands and shrugged off his coat, but before you could ask what he was doing he had thrown the warmed clothing over your shoulders. You looked at him, your mouth trying to form words, but he didn’t notice, being occupied by trying to guide your arms into the sleeves of his jacket and clasping the front shut, effectively dressing you in his coat. He looked practically naked without it, being left in his leather crop top and pants, and the cropped nature of the jacket didn’t do much in the way of covering you, but the warmed leather on your bare arms and the smell of sweet apples wafting off of his collar was more than comforting. You weren’t home, not yet, but it was close enough to feel like it.He looped his arms around your neck, pulling you closer to him, using his body to cover everything that his jacket still left exposed. His touch worked to slowly melt away the rest of your stress.“Would you like to go home, love?” He asked, his fingers finding the nape of your neck and massaging it soothingly.“Huh? No, Luci, this is- Charlie invited you and- you were so excited…isn’t this important to you?” You were on the verge of rambling, your eyes going wide at his suggestion. You hated the idea of making tonight about you. (Wasn’t that the opposite of what you were supposed to do?)“Not as important as you, ducky. Charlie’ll understand. Sooo, what’ll it be? Choice is all yours, my beautiful angel.” You smiled sheepishly at his compliment, your gaze falling down to the ground. A grin grew onto his face, sharp teeth fully on display.“I…I’d like that. I’d like to go home. Please.”“Done! Just let me say goodbye to Charlie, okay? Two seconds, love bug, I promise.” He kissed you on the forehead before letting you go to step through one of his portals, the bustling party just on the other side. The glowing circle *zlipped* closed as soon as he was through, leaving you alone on the balcony. The silence was deafening, but not overwhelming. It was comforting compared to what the party had sounded like.A cool wind blew past you, ruffling the tails of Lucifer’s coat and the ends of your skirt. You pulled the sides of his jacket tighter around you, fighting off the chill that threatened to run through you and trying to hide what the wind wanted to expose.As soon as the wind died down another portal opened up and Lucifer stepped back onto the balcony. He grabbed your hand and laced his fingers in yours as the portal shifted behind him. The slightly distorted view of the party died out and was instead replaced with the comforting sight of your shared bedroom.In one swift motion Lucifer scooped you up into his arms, being extra careful to not let your clothing sway out of place from the quick movement. You shrieked out of surprise, throwing your arms around his neck and clutching onto his shoulders for support as soon as you were lifted off of your feet. He chuckled softly, shifting your body against his so that your front was facing him, what was left of your exposed skin now blocked by his frame.He carried you through his portal, back into the familiar comfort and safety of your home, and placed you on your bed. He turned on a bedside lamp to get rid of the surrounding darkness and then he left your side for only a moment, making his way to a nearby dresser. You took the time as an opportunity to start shedding your horrid outfit. (The sooner the better.)But he heard your movements and stopped his search through the various dresser drawers, turning back around to face you. You were halfway done working off one of the clasps to those infernal heels when he interrupted you.“Oh no no no, allow me, sweetheart.” He rushed over, kneeling in front of you and placing his hands on top of yours to stop your motions. He swatted your hands away and started unbuckling the clasps himself before you could argue.“You don’t have to, Luci, I can do it.” You told him regardless. Three seconds later he had one heel off. You hadn’t realized how much your feet had been hurting until they started screaming at you once the shoe was off.“But I *want* to, ducky.” He retorted, working at the buckles of the other heel, his claws making short work of it. He stood up and walked back over to the dresser, taking the discarded shoes with him. You didn’t have the energy, or the heart, to argue with him anymore, so you sat patiently and waited for him to return.When he did he held two pieces of clothing in his hands, two pieces you instantly recognized. A hoodie and matching pair of sweatpants you always wore, particularly on days when you wanted to hide yourself away from the world. He laid them on the bed beside you for now.“Do you want me to help you with your dress or would you rather change in private?” He asked, giving you full control over the situation. You merely shrugged off his jacket and stood up, turning around to give him access to the dress’s zipper. He worked quietly, unzipping the dreadful thing and letting it pool to a heap at your feet. It was soon replaced with your hoodie coming over your head. “I figured you’d wanna be in something more comfortable after…all that.” He said as his hands guided the shirt down over your body as your arms instinctively found the sleeves. “I’ve always seen you wear this, so I assumed it was a safe option.” His eyes never wandered, not even once, as he knelt down again to help you into your sweats. Both articles of clothing were extremely oversized, hanging off of you like a blanket, but that was what made them so appealing on days like this.You pulled the drawstring of the sweatpants tighter, tying it into a bow to keep them from falling down. “It’s perfect, love. Thank you.” A small prideful smile found its way onto his lips and he leaned over your shoulder to give you a gentle kiss on the cheek. He snapped his fingers and his leather clothing was soon replaced with his duck-print button-up pajamas, his look now more matching yours on levels of comfortability.“Cuddles, my angel?” He asked as he began to run his claws through your hair.“Cuddles.” You agreed, nodding your head. He hopped up onto the bed, situating himself with his back against the headboard before he pulled you on top of him. You locked together like puzzle pieces, your face buried in his chest, his arms wrapped around your shoulders, and your legs tangled together. You sighed contently for the first time that day.His claws continued to card through your hair soothingly, being careful not to pull at any strands. “You didn’t ruin anything, you know.” You looked at him, and he continued once he had your attention. “I didn’t care what we did today, so long as it was with you. Besides Charlie, you’re all that really matters to me, not some silly rules made up for a human holiday.” He kissed the top of your head once he was finished.You didn’t know what to say, exhaustion starting to settle in your bones in earnest. So you just hummed in understanding, to let him know you had heard him and acknowledged what he had said. Your eyes fell closed from his rhythmic motions against your scalp and his heartbeat thumping underneath your ears. An angelic lullaby reserved only for you.A silence fell over the two of you for a while. Long enough that you were almost on the verge of sleep before he called out to you again. “I remember what you said, you know, about yourself. I think you’re beautiful, ducky. Gorgeous, even. No matter what your body looks like,” He paused, using his free hand to lace your fingers in between his, squeezing it gently. “You’ll always be beautiful to me.”