Work Text
At what point do you stop believing what your life has become? What point do you think everything is too hard, or not worth your time? That things would become unaffected if your existence suddenly wasn’t there?
Sitting on the edge of the bed, I let the scraping sounds of my most recent record find its way into the cracks in my soul. Outside in Zuzu city, the rain kept coming down, the torrent acting like a petulant child. My cell phone dings again- my mother who has been trying to get a hold of me for days after the repetitive argument of when I was going to settle down with someone and maybe have kids. Dragging my eyes away from the window, I pick up my phone but swipe away the unread message from my mother. As the phone turns back off, I can see just how bad things have gotten.
I stand to head to the bathroom, my joints creak and pop from misuse. How many times have I been on my knees, trying to lose my mind while throat deep on some stranger? Rubbing my face, I push the door open and flick on the light. The neon sign from across the street casts its orangey glow across the tile, bathing me in angles and shadows. They only accentuate the gauntness of my cheeks, the silver in my burgundy hair that I can never seem to cover, and the weightiness of the purple bags under my eyes. My blinks are slow as I try to think back to when everything went wrong.
“Hun, we’re going to miss you so much!” My mom squeezes the air out of me before I worm my way out of her grasp.
“I know mom, I’m going to miss you too, but ZuZu city is only a few hours away. I’ll visit.” In the back of my mind, I knew that wouldn’t be happening very much but whatever.
“Got everything?” She asks, brushing her brown hair out of her face.
I nod and toss my backpack in the passenger seat of my truck before slamming the door shut. She pulls me into one last hug before I set out towards new life, finally.
“Fuck,” I drag out and pull my chewing gum out of my back pocket. The coolness of peppermint helps me forget the empty look in my eyes as they stare back at me. A corpse’s eyes.
By the time I get my heavy coat on, I’m already debating not spending my night wandering around the city. But the look of my usual addictions makes me shake my head and shut the door to my apartment behind me. Snowy air only reinforces the sharp taste in my mouth, keeping me rooted in the steps of my boots on wet concrete. The frozen flakes glue themselves onto my lashes and into my hair. The bars I pass by are lively and inviting, but I’m so stuck in my head, thoughts bussing around like flies, that none of them offer the release I need. As a beater car drives by, the air of gasoline and smog choke the life out of my chest. The hacking and coughing that brings tears to my eyes and a rattling deep in my ribcage. Should I see a doctor? Probably, but I’d rather not have to foot the bill for them to tell me to stop smoking weed and sucking dick.
Pulling my hood up, I go to cross the street towards an old warehouse I haven’t explored yet. The outside looked like it used to be a calming blue, but the rain and elements have stripped even it’s happiness away. Brown rust stretches in the corners leisurely, and vines have started poking out from--
Blaring light hits my vision with screeching tires. My heart jumps into my throat almost as fast as I jump from almost being hit by some guy on a motorcycle. Behind the bright headlight, I can make out a mess of unruly hair and the smell of cigarette smoke slaps me in the face. Getting over to the other side of the street, I look back to see a pale face under the hair, the cig in his downturned mouth before he shouts at me to be more careful, and speeds away.
Fucking asshole.
Inside, the warehouse reeks of still water and mildew which keeps my exploring to a minimum. Only a few beer bottles and graffiti greet me in the darkened corners. My eyes search in the shadows for something-anything- to push me into my next adventure. The idea of running to some new place where I can explore even more pushes a thrill inside my bones. I can;’t just run away from the life I’ve tried to build here, but I have to cut the dead off or I’m only going to end up in another unmarked grave on the edge of the city.
Taking a deep breath, I make the trek back to my apartment. In the darkness of the alleyway next to my apartment, my phone buzzes again and I see another stupid fucking text from my mother. The intrusion pushes me past my apartment and towards the biker bar around the corner. At this rate, I’d take anything over sitting in the filth that is my apartment.
“Hey sweet stuff, wanna sit on Daddy’s lap?”
“Bring that ass over here!”
“I’ll unwrap you from all those layers!”
The catcalling rolls off of me, the usual drunk guys who only have two brain cells to rub together like their balls on some slut’s face. I shove my way through the people until I get to the bar and hop up on the stool closest to me.
“Xavier! Give me another fucking drink asshole!” I glance over to see some blonde women slumped over on the bar top, her tits nearly spilling out of her low cut shirt. Thankfully, the bartender, Xavier, grabs my order of a vodka soda first before heading towards his drunk patron. The drink lands in front of me not a moment later and I drain the glass way too fast. Spitting out the gum into the napkin, I replace the taste before signaling for another drink.
By the time I look around at the crowd, things are spinning again. A sigh leaves my lips as I know deep down, I need to get back to my apartment without being raped.
“Oh you’re a pretty one,” a voice murmurs next to me. A mess of dark brown hair swims into my vision and I have my head to keep things straight. A guy stands in front of me, his grey sweater sticking to his toned body. My mouth waters at the idea of being worshipped for once by a guy who could handle me. His hand finds his way next to my body, bracing himself on the bartop. Before I could continue the conversation, I spot a badge in his pocket. Joja Corp.
The bile rises in my throat before I could stop it, but thankfully I am able to swallow it back.
Someone from the company
. I told myself when I ended up at Joja that I would never sleep with a coworker. That rule ended 3 months in, after the holiday party when I found myself in the car behind the corporate building, swapping spit and cum with another worker. That didn’t stop me, not until the boss caught me making out with my latest hookup in the corner of a dark breakroom and called me into his office.
I choose not to remember what happened after he shut the door.
Besides, sleeping around the company didn’t get me to the top. Hard work, non-existent relationships with the people I cared about, sleepless nights, and letting myself crash and burn did.
The man leans in closer and I can feel his body heat. “Why don’t we go somewhere more private?” I nod before my rational side could say no. His hand wraps around mine and he leads me towards the bathrooms. Classic.
Opening up the men's room door, he locks it behind me before undoing his belt. Without thinking, I take off my jacket and strip to my bra. This is how it happens. Meet a guy in a bar. Let him take you to a new place. Let him kiss you until his dick throbs and lose yourself with his dick in your throat or filling your pussy.
Fuck me. Why do I do this?
I find myself quickly on my knees again- they hurt so fucking bad at this point I swear I have have arthritis- and his hand cupping my face. He’s gentle at least. Some guys end up causing me to black out because they have to be so aggressive.
“Take as much as you want love, I’ll give you whatever you want afterwards.” His offer sinks into my skin, warming me up from the inside out. A wetness gathers between my legs and I let my tongue loll out of my mouth to show my submissive agreement. The minute his dick is out, I swallow that bitch.
I do pride myself on my skills, despite the fact that I should not be swallowing genitals as much as I do.
I get the guy to cumming just by sucking on the tip so hard it begins to turn crimson. His grunts and moans only keep me from letting him fuck my throat as I run my tongue around the base and up the vein on the bottom of his penis, letting my tongue flick the slit of his dick. The next moan is a borderline whimper as I suckle on the sides of his dick, letting my hand play with the tip. His legs are shaking, rattling his belt buckle around his ankles.
That spurs me on to drink in his dick, letting it slide into the depths of my mouth, hollowing out my cheeks to suck
hard
causing him to cry out.
“I-I I-I’m g-gonna cu-
ah!
” In a quick pulse, he spurts his load into my throat. Keeping pace, I let him ride out his orgasm, hips bucking into my mouth before his legs relax, fully spent.
Swallowing what was left of his cum in my mouth, I sit back on my legs and wipe my face with the back of my hand.
My male counterpart puts his hands on his knees and slowly pulls his pants back up before letting out a deep sigh.
“
Fuck
- maybe I won’t- ah love let me help you up,” he takes my hand and helps me to my feet. “As promised- anything. Well anything I can get you.” he chuckles but a smile doesn’t lift to my face as I slowly dress myself.
A way out.