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As his teammates left to go after Reese, Chase turned his attention back to Douglas -- former enemy, biological father, adoptive uncle, mentor, even friend. It was a complicated relationship, to be sure, one Chase was still figuring out, but he knew he'd come to care as much for the man these days as he did for anyone else in his family. It was breaking Chase now to think he might have cost Douglas his life, all because he stupidly invited a girl he barely knew into their home. For being the smartest man in the world, it seemed he was easily duped ....
He shook the thought aside, hard; wallowing wouldn't help Douglas.
"How many fingers am I holding up?" Chase asked, after checking for breaks and internal injuries.
"I ... I don't know. I can't see them."
Chase's heart lurched in his chest. "What do you mean, you can't see them?" He knew the answer already, but he held on to desperate hope that he was wrong.
Douglas was unsettlingly resigned as he replied, "I can't see anything. Reese blasted me in the face just before she left. I felt like my eyes were on fire -- hurt so much, I blacked out. But even though I'm awake now, everything is still dark."
It took everything Chase had to stay outwardly calm while his heart tried to pound its way out of his rib-cage. He ignored the loop of the phrase This Can't Be Happening playing in his head as he grimly helped Douglas to their medical scanner. The device only confirmed his fear: Douglas was blind. Irrevocably. The only thing that kept Chase from punching the machine was the fact that breaking his hand would make him even more useless. "I ... I'm so sorry, to tell you this, Douglas, but ...." For the first time he could remember, he couldn't get the words out, a lump of grief blocking the way. It's all my fault ....
"I'm blind? Yeah, kinda figured," Douglas chuckled.
He must be in shock, Chase realised. "Douglas ..."
"Son, it'll be okay. In fact, this is a perfect excuse to try out the bionic occular upgrades I've been working on for the blind! Honestly, your girlfriend did me a fav--"
"She's not my girlfriend!" Chase snapped, surprised at his own vehemence. "I-I'm sorry, I ... I didn't mean to ...."
"Bite my head off?" Douglas laughed. "Hey, I totally understand. Don't forget, my ex tried to kill us all. Like father, like son, I guess!"
"To be honest, Dad, that doesn't make me feel better."
"Ha! I suppose not! Well, luckily for us, you do take after me, so you can get this done. I know Kaz and Oliver worked at that Mighty Med place, but, ah ... I wouldn't really trust them with this .... Now, the occular upgrades are in a box on the workbench, second drawer on the left."
Chase nearly threw up. "You ... y-you want me to ... operate on you?" The world started to spin; he steadied himself by leaning on the bed. He felt like a boa constrictor was wrapped around his ribs, squeezing the breath from him.
"Whoa, Chase, calm down!" Douglas reached out and, after a moment of fumbling around, found Chase, laying a hand on his shoulder. Chase was surprised at how comforting it was -- and furious at himself for needing comfort, much less getting it from the one who was actually hurt! "It's okay," Douglas assured him. "I'll have Donnie do it instead. No big deal."
"No big deal??" Chase echoed, incredulous. "You're blind because of me, and I can't even help you fix it!"
Douglas slid his hand down Chase's arm until he was gripping Chases's hand tight. "Hey. None of that. Reese did this. The blame lays squarely on her shoulders. Well, hers and mine."
Chase had been about to argue, until Douglas implicated himself. "Yours?" he asked instead, narrowing his eyes in confusion.
Douglas sighed. "Chase, you should be able to bring a girl home, like every other boy your age. And if not for me, you'd be able to -- I'm the one that made his own children into lab experiments, and subsequently made them targets for all the evil in the world!"
"Hey, I could have removed the chip!" Chase pointed out. "I haven't, because you also gave me something most guys my age don't have: abilities that help me save lives and make a difference in the world!" He sighed. "It's not your fault I haven't lived up to that."
"Whaddya talkin' about, kid? I've lost track of how many lives you've saved!"
Before Chase could protest, Perry's voice told them over the intercom that the paramedics had arrived.
"Can you walk, or should we bring them down here?" Chase asked.
"Let's go up. Hey, bring my upgrades -- maybe we can get a surgeon at the hospital to install them!"
Best not to bring more strangers down here, Chase thought bitterly as he fetched the box.
The rest of the team were already gone when Chase and Douglas got upstairs. Chase went in the ambulance with Douglas, partially to give Douglas a reprieve from Perry, partially out of guilt ... and partially because he didn't trust himself anymore to get the job done. He'd screwed up far too often of late; better to stay out of the way of the more competent heroes ....
Perry arrived at the hospital surprisingly quickly. Chase tried to ride out the agonising wait with her, but Perry was hard enough to tolerate on a good day -- and today had gotten just about as far from a good day as possible! She would not stop talking about Reese, rubbing in how foolish Chase had been. She also wouldn't stop talking about Douglas, imagining increasingly outlandish scenarios where she would be the man's caretaker. (Seriously, as if the man being blind wasn't bad enough!)
"I need some air," Chase declared finally, after a torturous three hours with no update -- not from the team, and not from the doctor.
"I'll come with you!" Perry decided, rising.
"No! I mean ... somebody has to stay here, in case there's any news. I'll be on the roof, in the garden, if the doctor needs to talk to me."
(Surprisingly, Perry didn't argue; Chase reckoned she liked the idea of being the first to hear any news about her Dougie, and therefore being the one everyone else would have to turn to for information ....)
By the time Chase made it to the roof, he was gasping like a fish out of water, thanks to a panic attack -- the worst he'd ever had. No one else knew about the attacks. They'd started in high school, when Chase dreaded having to face Trent -- not out of anxiety over the guy himself, so much as out of anxiety that Trent would trigger his Commando App. Chase had learned coping mechanisms -- breathing techniques, mantras, visual exercises .... He tried all of them now, but it still took a while for the panic to subside, leaving him drained, shaking. Even the garden around him, or the view of the city, did little to sooth him, his thoughts racing.
Everyone called him arrogant -- and he didn't blame them. But the truth of the matter was, he struggled all the time with his confidence. His whole life, he'd endured the mockery of his classmates and family. Adam even disparaged Chase's intelligence -- so Chase was constantly striving to prove his intelligence had value. And yet, despite his efforts -- and despite that, technically, he could use all the bionic abilities of his siblings -- AJ's calculations showed that Chase was the least useful member of his current team!
Even on occasions where he was lauded by others for being smart, though, it was a hollow victory: Chase hadn't been born with it, hadn't entirely earned it, but rather had been given his intelligence by artificial means. Worse, more and more often, Chase felt like he lacked the ability to use his knowledge effectively and responsibly.
Worse still was that he could never forget anything. Every mistake, every humiliation, was essentially burned into his database of a mind, to be rewatched whenever something triggered a memory -- or when his brain decided to plague him with the greatest hits of the worst moments of his life, something it was often wont to do in quiet moments. Since Chase wasn't exactly Mr Fun, and therefore not someone typically sought out for company, quite moments were bountiful. And every new day was a potential disaster to add to the pile.
Most days, with effort, he could manage to ignore the voices that told him the world would be better of without him, that he was worthless and unlovable. Ignore the paranoid feeling that, when he walked into a room, the people already there had been laughing about him. He would tell himself that everyone got teased, made mistakes, and felt insecure -- and usually, he managed to get himself to believe it.
His best effort wasn't enough right now, though. The first tear was the first crack in the mask he always wore, the first crack in the dam he kept his despair behind. That wall shattered the next instant, mask dissolving under a sudden but torrential downpour streaming from his eyes. He buried his head in his arms to stifle the sounds of his sobbing, unable to stop himself a second longer from being swept away by his emotions. He just didn't have the strength anymore.
After a while, he looked up -- or rather, down over the edge of the roof. The ground beckoned like a siren. All his anguish would be over in an instant, the unrelenting voices silenced. He'd never trouble anyone again. Wasn't that the responsible thing to do? If he kept creating harm, shouldn't he make it so it was impossible to continue harming others? He was almost eager, now, climbing atop the ledge, relief in sight as he looked down at the ground ....
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
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Donald hurried to the waiting room, disappointed to find only Perry waiting there. Chase had called him, saying Douglas had been hurt, blinded by Riker and Roman's sister, Reese. He'd said the rest of the team had gone after the girl, who had stolen the superhero list and cut them off from the network; Donald supposed Chase had gone out to help them. He braced himself and asked Perry, "How's my brother?"
"They've stabilised him, but they won't let me see him -- even after I said I was his wife!" Perry complained.
Donald suppressed a shudder. "But you're not, right?" Surely Douglas hadn't married her!
"Not yet," Perry replied ominously.
"Where's Chase?" Donald inquired, suddenly really, really hoping his son was in the building after all.
"He said he was going to the rooftop garden. Probably to mope over his girlfriend."
Donald was already turning to go to the roof, when he stopped and turned back. "Girlfriend?"
"Reese! He's the dummy who brought her to the tower -- really, it's all his fault Dougie's hurt!"
An ominous feeling started to build in the pit of Donald's stomach. He needed to know more -- first and foremost, that his son was okay!
He hurried to the rooftop -- and when he spotted Chase standing on the ledge, his stomach dropped. "Chase!" he called out without thinking -- and nearly had a heart attack when his son, startled, lost his balance for a moment before turning to him, cheeks wet and eyes red. "Chase, please, come down from there," he begged, beckoning with both hands as he slowly came forward.
Chase seemed to wake from a dream then, looking surprised and disoriented by his position. He got down, but looked back a moment; Donald wasn't sure if Chase was horrified by what he'd almost done, or wishing he'd succeeded. Chase then faced Donald, eyes apologetic and uncertain before he quickly cast them to the ground. Donald couldn't remember the last time Chase, who'd so often seem far older than his years, ever seemed so young, so lost, so in need of a parent's comfort and guidance.
Donald just hoped he was up to the task of providing both ....
Approaching cautiously, Donald hurried the last few feet and gathered Chase into his arms tightly, relieved. He didn't let go when his son let out a sob against his shoulder, gratified when the young man finally returned the embrace, clinging to his father for dear life.
"It's all right, Chasey, I'm here. Just let it all out," Donald told him quietly, one hand carding Chase's hair, and the other rubbing his back, like he used to do when Chase was a little boy. It worked now like it had then, sobs quieting. Chase relaxed, then gently pulled away; Donald slung an arm around the boy's shoulder, leading him to a bench.
"I'm sorry," Chase whispered, eyes flicking nervously to Donald before settling on the ground again.
"For trying to take my son from me? I certainly hope so!" He almost said it was the stupidest thing Chase had ever done. Now that the reason for fear had subsided, frustration was rising -- but he knew that anger was the last thing Chase needed right now, so he took a deep breath, trying to reign it in.
Chase looked up in horror, glancing at the wall, then back to Donald. He tried to say something, but couldn't seem to find the words. He studied his hands, as if he'd find them written there, like Adam used to do to pass his tests. Donald laid his hand over both of Chase's, squeezing.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that," Donald apologised. "But please, Chase, help me understand how you got here. And I don't mean whether you took the stairs or the elevator." His joke didn't ease the tension one iota.
"I ... I keep ... failing," Chase finally replied, in little more than a whisper. "More and more, lately, I seem to ... to screw up everything I do! It's no wonder, when AJ ranked the team, I came in last -- and his math was good, it wasn't biased. I really am lowest man on the totem pole." Donald didn't know who this AJ was, but he wanted to find him and tell him to stick his rankings where the sun don't shine .... "But even before he ranked us, I would get so insecure, I'd ... I'd cheat to get ahead. Honestly, I've realised ... I'm a terrible person! Vain, selfish. I seem to annoy everyone. I find myself getting downright mean sometimes." Donald was about to protest, but then Chase dropped a bombshell: "And I ... I'm lonely. I don't know how to relate to anyone, don't have anything in common with anyone my own age. Everyone tells me I'm boring, but I just don't understand what everyone else finds fun -- or why they don't like the things I think are fun."
Donald felt a pang of heartbreak for his son; he knew something of what all that was like, but at least he'd had Dougie, his intellectual equal more or less, growing up ....
"Even the androids I built to be my friends preferred Kaz over me," Chase went on. Donald resisted the urge to press for more details on the androids; now was not the time. "I'm such a-a pathetic loser, so ... desperate for affection, Reese was able to exploit my weakness just like that." Chase snapped his fingers for emphasis. "A-and now Douglas is seriously hurt, and all the superheroes are in danger! I'm no leader -- I'm a liability," he added quietly.
Donald felt a wave of guilt. How had things gotten so bad for his son without him noticing? He put an arm around Chase again, pulling him close, leaning his head against son's as he tried to think of what to say.
"While I'm not gonna say the cheating or being mean is okay, you know I've done both. And I've seen your siblings give as good as they get in the meanness department -- heck, they're usually mean first, especially Adam. We're all human, all flawed. Yes, even me, no matter how much I claim otherwise.
"But despite how Reese treated you, despite even the fact that she hurt someone you care about, your first instincts were to take care of Douglas, and to explore the possibility of your own accountability, rather than to hunt her down in vengeance. That tells something about how good of a man you are -- better than me, that's for sure!
"And the thing about totem poles? The lowest man is the one holding everybody else up. Granted, I don't agree with this AJ person's list, per se, but I know that's part of what you do for the team -- it's what you've always done. You've always had a knack for getting the best out of people, putting their abilities to the best use. It's why I made you team leader all those years ago.
"Now, I hate to admit it, but like Adam with you, I bullied Dougie a lot when we were growing up. His reaction to sibling rivalry was to become an evil scientist. But even he's come around to being a decent guy -- and that's in part due to your good influence! Meanwhile, I know I don't have to worry about you going evil, because I've seen you do the right thing, even when the temptation has been strong to do otherwise. I've seen you be open to criticism and learn from your mistakes -- maybe not instantly, but more than I seem able to. And I've seen you show great compassion -- you were the one who talked me into giving Douglas a second chance, and now I have my brother back, thanks to you. And you were even kind enough to let Perry stay -- that took a big heart! So you, son, are about as far away from a 'terrible person' as it gets."
Chase looked chagrined. "Actually ... I let Perry stay because she blackmailed me." Donald pushed down a sense of alarm, figuring it was best to let his son talk uninterrupted. Sighing, eyes on his hands again, Chase explained, "There was a mission I didn't get to go on because Perry blasted the hyperlift, and I couldn't get out of the command center. Skylar filled in as mission leader, and everyone went on and on about how great she was ... so when there was another mission, underground, I disabled the hyperlift while Skylar was downstairs, so she would be stuck like I had been, and I would have a chance to prove myself. Skylar and Perry got out through underground tunnels to where we were, and they and I got caught together under a pile of rubble. Perry figured out what I'd done, so I admitted it. Having lost her powers, Skylar said she understood what it was like to feel like you've lost your identity, and forgave me, saying she wouldn't tell the others. Perry, of course, wanted to stay at the tower -- that was her price for not telling the others." Chase looked up then, fear in his eyes. "I ... I'll understand if you want me off the team."
Donald's heart broke a little more .... "Chase, I would never want that," he promised. "Again, I'm not saying what you did was okay, but ... well, I'd be a hypocrite if I said I'd never done something underhanded to a rival. And you weren't trying to hurt her or something. Heck, locking someone in a room is a pretty common prank -- although I'm not condoning it, mind! But you realised what you did was wrong, you apologised--"
Chase jumped up and whirled on Donald, looking horrified. "Stop! Stop shrugging things off like that! Skylar could have turned out to be the difference between saving someone and not -- someone could have died that day thanks to my selfishness!"
"You didn't let me finish, Chase," Donald chided, standing up and gently taking Chase by the shoulders. "I was going to say that you also learned. I might not have known you were behind Skylar being stuck, but I knew she was stuck -- I remember that situation being the reason you gave that Perry should stay. And I also know what happened after -- that you gave up being team leader because of that mission and the one before it. You told me you felt everyone had something to offer, and so everyone should be able to step up. You learned something, and you applied what you learned -- you evolved. I know I can trust you not to make that same mistake you made that day again.
"As for Skylar saving people ... yeah, okay, that scenario might have come up -- and maybe the hyperlift would have still have been broken from Perry, or broke down for some other reason, so Skylar still wouldn't have been there. Or maybe she would have been there, but failed to save someone. You could drive yourself crazy thinking about what-ifs. I mean, sure, as a strategist, it's good to think of multiple possibilities, yes ... but guilting yourself over them won't do anything but make you second-guess yourself -- and you can't afford hesitation in the middle of a crisis. Now, yes, you need to do your best to have every team member on a mission -- so just remember that moving forward, and be grateful things did out okay that time, that you had a chance to learn something without paying too high a price for the lesson. You can't move on if you're constantly looking in the rearview mirror."
"But it wasn't an isolated incident!" Chase protested. "My judgment is faulty -- look what happened with Reese!" He screwed his eyes shut, lip trembling.
"Hey. Look at me." Donald lifted Chase's chin, forcing him to meet his eyes. "What happened that was so wrong? You took someone at face value? That's a normal reaction -- it could have happened to anyone! Yeah, she turned out to be a villain -- but she could have turned out to be your Tasha. To be honest, I would rather see you risk letting a hundred villains through the door than have you be suspicious of everyone you meet now. And who knows -- maybe you'll turn out to have a positive influence on Reese, same as you've had on Douglas."
Chase snorted, scoffing, but Donald thought there was a spark of hope in his son's eyes.
Donald carded his fingers into Chase's hair, to the back of his head, then rest his forehead against his son's. "I know you're probably not ready to hear this and actually believe it, but I think you're amazing, and I'm proud to call you my son. I love you. So please ... stay." His voice was thick by the time he said those last words. Eyes stinging, he hugged Chase again, kissing his forehead, thanking The Powers That Be that he hadn't arrived too late; his son was still there to endure parental smothering.
After a moment, to his relief, Chase returned the hug. "Okay, Dad," he whispered, voice rough with emotion. Chase then drew back, eyes averted again, and Donald saw how weary his son looked -- far too much so for his years. "Honestly, I can't believe I was even thinking that way," Chase admitted. "I didn't even feel like me. I just ...." He took a shuddering breath, wiping his eyes. "I just got kinda overwhelmed for a minute, I guess."
"It happens," Donald replied, squeezing the boy's shoulder. "Just ... if you ever get that low again, know that I'm always ready to listen -- and remember that we'd all be ..." his voice had trouble getting past the lump in his throat, but he managed, "devastated to lose you!" He hoped the tear he could feel trailing down his face made itself useful as an exclamation point to his words.
Chase looked surprised, like it had never occurred to him how his loss would hurt those left behind. Just when Donald thought his heart couldn't break any further .... He knew this wasn't over -- Chase was clearly suffering from clinical depression. Donald was going to have to talk to the others about keeping an eye on Chase, and making an effort to be kinder to him, to include him. And Donald would need to figure out how to get Chase to start seeing a therapist without making Chase feel worse about himself for needing to ....
But first thing was first. "You feel up to dealing with Perry, so I can check on Douglas?"
The sudden look of alarm quickly faded into resolve as Chase, sighing, nodded.
Donald ruffled Chase's hair affectionately. "That's my boy. You keep her occupied in the waiting room -- tell her I went to the men's room, or to get coffee, or something -- and I'll go talk to the doctor."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
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Chase looked as tired as Bree felt. There were dark circles around each of his eyes, which were also red, and he wavered as he got to his feet. There was a light of hope in his eyes too, though -- the desperate kind. She braced herself for when it went out, like she knew it would.She didn't even need to say anything, apparently."You didn't find her," Chase sighed. It wasn't a question."And Rodissius wasn't where we left him," Skyler added.Bree almost kicked her friend.Chase's brow furrowed in confusion. "Why would he have been?""Did you think he was just gonna hang around in one spot all night?" Kaz laughed. "That wasn't exactly a great vantage point for watching the carnage!""Hey! Some people like the front row, getting right up where the action is!" Oliver protested, clearly defending Skylar -- of course. (Skylar could say the ocean was pink, and Bree bet Oliver would jump at defending her -- without even knowing why she said it.)"Oh! That's right, You guys didn't see it!" Skylar realised.The urge to kick Skylar was harder to resist this time, but Bree managed, settling for a pointed glare -- which Skylar missed."After Rodissius showed up, Bree stayed behind a minute to give him a smackdown with Flashlight Hands!" Skylar explained.Chase looked to Kaz. "You kept talking about that .... Let me guess, Bree has a new power?" he asked wearily.Bree cringed. This was the real reason she hadn't wanted to say anything for a while about her superpowers -- she hadn't wanted her brother to feel bad about being the only person on the team without any. Not after AJ's list. And now, with his recent heartbreak, him hearing about yet another power of Bree's had to be adding insult to injury ...."Yeah, Bree's got lights in her hands!" Kaz laughed."Hence the name 'Flashlight Hands'?" Chase replied dryly, rolling his eyes."Well, I guess we'll need a new name for it," Skylar reflected. "Turns out, when she puts her hands close together, they form an energy bolt! She used it on Rodissius to punish him for messing with you," she added to Chase.He turned to Bree, looking surprised -- and touched. "You ... you did that for me?"It hurt that he was surprised, but Bree knew that was her own fault -- she needed to do a better job of letting her baby bro know she loved him! "Nobody messes with my little brother," she told him, repeating what she'd said to Rodissius.He smiled -- albeit a bit tightly, sadness still hiding in the corners of his mouth, and a hint of tears in his eyes. "Thanks, Sis," he replied, his voice rough. To her surprise, he hugged her tightly."Oh! I do have some good news, though!" Skylar offered.Chase turned to face her, an arm still around Bree. He looked wary, probably afraid to get his hopes up -- not that Bree blamed him. The team had split up to search, though, and had met up only just before entering the hospital -- maybe Skylar really did have good news!"I found Crossbow!" Skylar revealed.Yup, that qualified!Chase abruptly let go and grabbed Skylar by the shoulders, fast enough that Bree almost wondered if he had super-speed now. "Does her network connection work?" he asked desperately."Yes!" Skylar cheerfully informed them. "We managed to get the word out to the other superheroes!"There was a hearty round of celebration, which included Oliver hugging Skylar -- who actually put up with it. Chase, though, seemed less ecstatic so much as just plain relieved, plopping down on a chair as if his legs no longer worked, and running shaking hands through his hair. "Thank god," he whispered.Worried, Bree sat beside him, rubbing his back. He looked up, surprised again, then smiled wanly. She was about to ask him how he was doing, when Perry broke in, her screeching voice like nails on a chalkboard."Oh, who cares about your stupid friends! I wanna know how my Dougie is!"Come to think of it, Bree wanted to know too -- to her surprise, despite all he'd done, Douglas had really turned himself around, and become part of the family. Chase had grown particularly attached to 'Uncle Daddy' -- she thought it was sweet, and was glad Chase had someone more like him to hang out with. Now, though, she worried what it would do to Chase if Douglas didn't pull through ...."Do we know anything about how Douglas is?" she asked him.Chase, looking despondent, started to speak, but Perry cut him off."Dougie's blind!!" she wailed."What??" Bree and the rest of group cried in unison."And it's permanent," Chase revealed, his voice giving out and his eyes glittering; he screwed his eyes tight against the tears. Bree took his hand; he gave hers a squeeze, but couldn't seem to manage a smile anymore, barely reacting when Kaz sat beside him and laid a sympathetic hand on his shoulder.Chase took a shaky breath, and continued. "Douglas has a prototype for bionic eyes that he wants to try -- I'm guessing he was developing them for our friend Taylor. There's a question of whether we can find someone who can do the operation, though. Otherwise, all we know is that he's stabilised, and he's unconscious. The doctor said she'd let us know as soon as there was more to tell."Perry suggested, "Maybe they'd tell Donnie more -- if he ever comes back from the bathroom!"Suddenly, Chase seemed nervous, his voice a bit high. "Well, he did say he'd get some coffee after that ...."Bree quickly realised what was really going on: Chase was babysitting Perry while Mr Davenport was talking to the doctors! Thankfully, Perry apparently hadn't cottoned on. Meanwhile, Bree got an idea. "Come to think of it, I could use a trip to the ladies', and a snack break. Anyone want anything?" she asked."Cheese Doodles and Mountain Dew," Oliver and Kaz both said at once. "Jinx! Jinx again! Ji--"Skylar put a hand over each of their mouths. "Snickers and a Coke, please.""Chase?" Bree asked, heart sinking when he shook his head. "C'mon, Big Sis says you need to eat.""I can't. Maybe later."Sighing, she gently ruffled his hair, then turned to leave."Hey, what about me?" Perry brayed.Cursing herself for not super-speeding away, Bree turned back, waiting. Perry asked for pretty much every snack food possible."Why don't I just bring the entire vending machine?" Bree asked sarcastically."Whatever's easiest," Perry shrugged. "Just make sure you wash your hands after the bathroom! Who knows where you've been!"This time, Bree did super-speed away -- but she didn't go to the ladies' room or to the vending machine. She activated her invisibility, snuck to the nurses' station to see where Douglas was supposed to be, and ran to his room.Mr Davenport was in there, talking to the doctor, shaking the woman's hand."The team and I will read this over and let you know in a day or two if it's feasible," the doctor said, holding up a flash drive."That would be great," Donald replied."Thaaaanks, Dooooc!" Douglas added from his bed, waving weakly, seeming a little loopy -- Bree reckoned he was on pain meds.The doctor left, and Mr Davenport sank down on the bed. Still invisible, Bree came into the room, standing off to the other side of the bed, where she could see them both."How are you feeling?" Mr Davenport asked, looking and sounding more sympathetic than she'd ever seen him be towards his brother before."Not perfect, but better. I dunno what they gave me, but it's doin' the job well enough. I mean, I know the pain is there, but it's like it's sitting across the room instead of in bed with me. Ya know?"Davenport chuckled. "Not really, but I'll take your word for it. I'm glad you're not hurting too much.""Thaaanks, Donnie!" The man's smile suddenly fell, brow furrowing. "Hey ... how's Chasey?"Davenport sighed. "Not good. Not good at all. He, uh ...." Suddenly, Davenport started to cry, silently.Watching him, Bree felt dread creep over her. But why? Yeah, Chase was upset, but he wasn't physically hurt -- if there was something wrong, wouldn't he be in a hospital bed, not the waiting room?"Donnie? You're scaring me. And that's really hard to do right now, after those happy pills! Out with it," Douglas demanded, worry seeming to make him more lucid.Davenport composed himself. "When I got to the waiting room, Perry said Chase was up in the rooftop garden. When I got there, I found him ... standing on the ledge, ready to jump."Bree gasped, then covered her mouth with both hands, hoping her sound was covered by her uncle's own outburst."What??" Douglas roared, sitting up and grasping for his brother, the heart monitor starting to race. When he found Davenport's arm, his fingers looked to be digging hard into the limb. "Donnie, is he ...?" Bree had never seen the man more terrified (and Douglas was frequently stalked by Perry, so that was saying a lot!)."No, no -- I got there in time!" Davenport assured him.Douglas felt back against the pillow, panting, monitor slowing. A nurse rushed in just then."It's fine, I just accidentally gave him a fright," Davenport assured her."Actually, I think you gave me a heart attack!" Douglas glared in the general direction of his brother. "How's about leading with something like, 'He's fine now, but I thought you should know ...'?"The nurse seemed to decide everything was all right, and left the men to their banter."So ... did he do that because of me?" Douglas asked, looking very upset by the possibility.Davenport sighed. "I won't lie, that was probably the straw that broke the camel's back -- that, and that girl turning out to have used him, and the superheroes being in danger .... But there was a lot of straw there already, before this night." And Davenport then related all Chase had apparently told him.Bree felt guilty for listening in on the details of Chase's private confession, but that guilt was mitigated some by the fact that Davenport was already telling Douglas, so technically the confidentiality was already broken. They were family, and would need to work together to help Chase. The more she listened, though, the worse she felt. Clearly she and the others (especially Adam) had taken their teasing too far ...."Really, he thought that was awful?" Douglas remarked after Davenport told how Chase had apparently trapped Skylar in the control center with Perry. "Did he forget everything I did to you guys? No way is he in my 'Evil League of Evil' league!"While Bree was surprised Chase would do something like that, she agreed it really wasn't so terrible, in the grand scheme of things. And then Davenport explained how Chase himself viewed the incident ....Bree decided it must be a truly terrifying thing to be inside her brother's head, with his lofty morals coupled with a tendency to obsess over every possibility. At the rate he was going, he was going to eventually be afraid to walk, for fear of stepping on an ant and somehow causing the collapse of civilization in the process .... But then, she supposed that very tendency to consider all possibilities was why he'd been leader for so long. She realised there was a downside to being super-smart -- something he'd apparently struggled with all his life, and she'd never realised it.She knew that part of why Douglas had misused his genius, how he'd become evil, was because of how Davenport had treated him, sure ... but what if it was also a matter of being smart enough to see all the ways things could go wrong? What if he eventually decided it hurt too much to care, because it was nearly impossible to protect everyone from all that could happen? Maybe the burden of knowledge, coupled with a lifetime of mockery, was like a slow-acting poison in his and Chase's brilliant brains ....In that light, she realised they should all be grateful Chase had a strong moral compass guiding him -- and that he was so good at guiding the rest of them, in turn! She resolved to make it clear how much she admired him as a leader (apparently, even the smartest man in the world didn't grasp everything).Davenport had continued his story while Bree was thinking; now, he seemed to be finished.To her shock, Douglas turned his head in Bree's general direction, then, saying, "Bree, would you mind getting Chase in here -- without Terry knowing?"Davenport looked as shocked as Bree felt."How did you know I was here?" Bree asked as she made herself visible."I thought I heard someone else come in, but dismissed that when Donnie didn't say hello, and no one new spoke. And then I heard a gasp when Donnie mentioned Chase almost jumping off the roof. It wasn't Donnie, obviously, and the doc had left, so Invisible Bree was the next logical option. Taylor was right -- one's other senses really do get enhanced to compensate for a lack of vision!" he added gleefully. He quickly sobered, though. "You shouldn't let on to Chase that you know about what he almost did. We gotta let him tell us in his own time, if at all, or he'll have trust issues.""Like I do now, little miss super-spy," Davenport added pointedly."S-sorry! I only meant to get past the doctor to check on Douglas, but then I heard you talking about Chase .... Ishegonnabeokay?" she asked in a rush, anxiety making it hard to stay slow."I don't know," Davenport admitted, getting to his feet and walking over to her. "But I think it would help a lot if you not only were more mindful of what you say to Chase, but you also stick up for him more around others. Okay?"She nodded vigorously (by their standards; it was still slow by hers). "Inevermeanttohurthim!""I know." Davenport hugged her. "We never do, but it's always easiest to hurt those who love us the most. For that matter, we could all stand to be nicer to each other, in general."She nodded."You're hugging, aren't you?" Douglas asked. "It's okay, I'm just the lonely injured man, here; pay me no mind ...."Chuckling, Bree hugged Douglas. "Get better quick, okay? I suck at waiting!""I wouldn't expect a speedster to be any other way," Douglas winked.Bree stopped at the restroom, then the cafeteria for an apple, then the vending machine, and still made it back to the waiting room before Mr Davenport. From her position in the hall, she could see Chase, but he wasn't looking at her -- or anyone. He sat with his hands clasped between his knees, eyes studying them like they held the secrets of the universe. And then a thought occurred to her: was he remembering holding hands with Reese? Was he thinking he should have felt something in her touch, some clue that she wasn't the soulmate she pretended to be? Or maybe he was wishing he was back at that moment, just a few hours earlier, when he thought he'd found love and tried to share his happiness with his family.Bree had refused to believe someone could love her brother, accusing him of abducting the girl. Now that he knew Reese been just leading him on, would Chase himself believe Bree was right, that no girl would willingly be with him? Never mind that Bree was actually wrong about that. Would he forget the times girls had chased after him, as Bree often overlooked?
What have I done?
Chase was brave, smart, loyal, kind -- maybe not always, but who was? And he was those things more often than most people were. So why did she keep treating him like he was never any of those things?Tears welled; she fought them back. Douglas had asked to talk to Chase; she had a feeling it would do her brother good to hear whatever the man had to say. She had a new mission, one she'd really had all along, but vowed to take more seriously now: to care for her brother.Entering the waiting space, she handed Chase the apple, saying, "Please, just try to get it down. For me."Chagrined, he nodded, taking a small bite and chewing with obvious reluctance. Satisfied, she handed out the rest of the items, ignoring Perry's complaints that she'd only brought the woman three snacks and one kind of soda.Davenport arrived then, reporting that Douglas had been awake and in good spirits, and that they'd know in a day or two if they'd found a surgical team willing to take the case. Chase seemed nominally relieved. Perry was not happy when Davenport said the man was to have no more visitors that night, and they were all to leave."Give you a lift home?" Bree asked Chase, stooping a little so he could piggyback.Chase shrugged, circling her shoulders with his arms, locking his wrists in front of her. They had done this so often, and he was so preoccupied, it was probably an action driven by muscle memory at this point.She took off -- and stopped a half-second later in the room Douglas was in, instead of home ....
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
~ ß ß ß ~
"Douglas!" Chase gasped.
The guilty look he then gave Bree suggested that room was the last place on Earth he wanted to be. Thinking maybe this was a bad idea, she wondered if she should maybe just take him home -- except she didn't want to disappoint Douglas ....
"Hey, Chasey! Thanks for bringing him, Bree."
Chase looked at her, seeming confused for a moment. "How did you know to bring m... Oh. This is where you went -- that's why it took so long for you to get back with the snacks ...."
"I ... I just wanted to see if he was all right," Bree hedged, "but then I saw Davenport was in here, talking to the doctor--"
"And I heard Bree, so I asked her to find a way to get you here without Terry," Douglas finished, neatly avoiding the topic of what was really discussed.
"Mr Davenport said you were doing well, but also that the doctors said we had to leave, let you rest ...." Chase pointed out.
"Aw, Chasey, don't you wanna see me?" Douglas pouted.
"No! I-I mean yes, I do! I ... I just ...." Chase stammered.
"Donnie made up that story about the doctor sayin' ya had ta leave just so Terry would go," Douglas explained. "I wanted to spend some quality time with you two. Now come sit by me, so I don't have to shout!" He patted the bedspace to either side of him, and they hurriedly settled in. "So, any updates with the shapeshifter situation?"
Bree told him about Crossbow.
"Well, that's something!" Douglas replied with a smile.
"It's definitely great, but the shapeshifters are still attacking innocent civilians," Chase pointed out. "I've been trying to think of a way to contain them, but it's hard without a sample to study."
"Chase, you're the smartest man in the world -- you'll figure it out!" Douglas replied with total conviction, reaching out a hand until he was patting his son's knee.
Chase hissed and leapt away as if the touch burned him. "Don't call me that, please," he pleaded, then began to pace.
Douglas scowled. "Why not?"
"Because it's not true! I'm just a ... a-a kid with a technological enhancement! Take the chip away, and I'm just an ordinary guy!"
"Whatever gave you that idea?" Douglas asked, sounding bemused.
"We traded chips, once! I got Adam's, and suddenly I was average. And Bree, who had my chip, was smart!"
Douglas pursed his lips, humming a moment. "Smarter, maybe, but not as smart as you. No offense, Bree."
"None taken." Even she had thought at the time that she hadn't been as smart as Chase always seemed. And frankly, after that experience -- and especially seeing now how Chase suffered for his smarts -- she was fine with being of ordinary intellect ....
"Okay first of all, let's assume the chip does make you smarter -- which is a matter of semantics that I wouldn't agree with, but I'll come back to that," Douglas began. "Think for a moment: if one's body is essentially an organic machine, then what is a brain?"
Chase was quiet a moment. Then, hesitantly, he offered, "A bioelectrical computer?"
"Right! One that a person's parents make for them! So why does the fact that I made your chip with my hands, instead of by reproductive means, invalidate whatever it grants you beyond the genetics I already donated to you? The chip still came from me, right?"
"True," Chase conceded; Bree could swear she heard the gears turning in his head.
"But secondly, your chip doesn't actually increase your intelligence, exactly, so much as increase your ability to utilise it. Like using Windows versus DOS. Most people are using ... well, let's be kind and say Windows 98. Without your chip, you're XP, and with it, you're 10."
Chase sat down, looking thoughtful.
"DOS? XP? English, please? Some of us don't speak Geek!" Bree demanded.
"DOS stands for 'Disk Operating System'. It's the root of how a computer works. Think if it as a 'lizard brain'," Chase explained. "As computers got better -- kinda like humans evolving -- they got other operating systems, or OSes, ones that made using them easier, and also allowed for more complex programmes. 98, XP and 10 are editions of the operating system known as Windows. For a human, it would be a little like the differences between grade levels in school."
Douglas nodded. "Exactly. Now, what can you do with a memory card?"
Chase shrugged. "Add programmes, save or upload files, add RAM ...."
"RAM?" Bree asked.
"Random-Active Memory," Chase replied, distracted, clearly thinking about what Douglas had asked, even as he explained, "It basically determines how much a computer can do at once, and how quickly." He turned to Douglas. "Are you saying that my chip works like that? Like an SD card expanding my RAM?"
"To some degree, yeah," Douglas confirmed. "And upgrades your OS, and serves as back-up storage, and carries the programming you need for your bionics. But Chase, it's the user who decides what programmes and other information to add to a computer, and how to use everything. I may have put a calculator app in your chip, but you input the numbers and decided whether to divide or multiply.
"Now, would you say an artist who wears glasses isn't an artist without them? Or do they still have an artistic mind, even if their ability to actually create the physical form is inhibited? Would you say an artist who uses Photoshop is less of an artist, just because they use a programme that allows them to do their work faster and with more precision? Or would you say, 'Hey, look at all the cool things they can do now, that they wouldn't have been able to do with non-digital tools'? And how about the fact that some people struggle with Photoshop, while others come up with masterpieces? Same programme, different levels of ability.
"No one could use your chip like you do, Chasey. You still make the choices on how to use your intelligence -- I just gave you some better tools to work with. That's all."
Even with tears making his eyes glisten, Chase looked more at ease now -- and grateful, as he reached a hand out to Douglas, mirroring the man's earlier gesture to him. "Thank you," he said, voice rough.
Douglas smiled fondly. "De nada, kid."
"How did you get so wise, anyway?" Bree wondered aloud, bemused. Wisdom and Evil didn't really go hand-in-hand ....
"Being frozen in a block of ice gives one a lot of time to reflect," he replied sagely.
"And a lot of reason to reconsider one's life choices, I'd wager," Chase mused.
"That too," Douglas replied ruefully.
Chase's eyes suddenly grew wide -- Bree was afraid, for a moment, that they did so with horror, until a bright smile then lit her brother's face. "I think I know someone else who could use an opportunity for self-reflection too!" he laughed, suddenly hugging his mentor.
Bree found herself grinning, relieved to see her brother joyous again. And really, it was sweet watching them be affectionate -- there needed to be more of that in the Davenport family's lives.
"We'll try to be back tomorrow," Chase promised, "but we gotta go!"
"Go where?" Douglas asked, seeming a little dejected.
"Go put the tools you gave me to good use!" Chase replied, grabbing Bree by the wrist and pulling her towards the door.
"Good luck!" their biological father called out -- beaming, she saw as she looked back, even though he couldn't actually see them.
Bree dug her heels in halfway down the hallway. "Chase!"
Chase turned back to her, confused. "Bree, what ...?"
"Are you gonna just walk home?" she asked, then turned, glancing at him over her shoulder.
"Oh! Right!" He smiled, chagrined, and got on her back -- giving her a quick hug. "Thanks, sis."
She almost stumbled in surprise at the show of affection. "You're welcome," she told him sincerely, smiling back (even though he obviously couldn't see it from his position) as a wave of warmth rolled over her. She would not cry. She would not cry. She ....
Well, at least they were happy tears, and her speed would dry them ....